HIV Support Group

Update: So far, I've had two experiences disclosing my status to a sex partner (the first was a one night stand and the other a potential LTR)... both experiences were great. The one night stand had a huge sigh of relief when I told him and he proceeded to tell me that he was HIV + as well. The potential LTR has known from our first date... I felt it was important to disclose my status because of the nature of our relationship (friends first) and it hasn't been an issue. He's done his research and feels comfortable with the risk. For the first time since testing positive 3 months ago, I can see the potential in dating someone who is negative and it's a big step for me... lots of progress. Thanks for all of your responses... very helpful and encouraging!

That's awesome. My bf is neg, and sometimes it's a strain on us both, and I sometimes feel he doesn't understand why i have to do the things I do to try and stay healthy.

So I bet having someone who's at least in the same boat has to be great as far was being on the same page knowledge-wise.

Keep smiling that sexy Montana smile!!

Hello and Peace to you! I just finished a clinical study at OSU Medical Center on "To Disclose or not to"...and was very enlightening. I have ben poz for about three yrs now and undetectable now but am straight-up honest about my staus and get it out on the table right away, as I too was the victim of a guy that did not feel it was warranted to tell me UNTIL some exchange of fluid (oral only), did he do so. I know they say it is harder to get it orally but at that time in my life, was progressively having dental work/replacements and it HAD to be from some healing wounds in my mouth and the fact he had a viral load in the millions but tested negative Nov 06, then Dec 06 my health started to fail in a number of ways, Feb had MRSA infections requiring surgical removal, and tested neg. then as well--the next month had something else come up and that test showed I was HIV POZ and the #'s were AIDS status #'s....because this jerk had such a high viral load....that makes a difference but if you are undetctable, that in NO way means to have BB sex with everyone, and not tell a soul your status, as a LOT of guys will do. I have tried dating here and there, finding a couple of the guys were actually "BUG CHASERS", people that think if they become POZ, they will be part of something bigger they are missing, or some psychorabble like that.
Sorry so long-winded here, but I will just say that I will not give up meeting so called Mr Right, but nor am I desperate. But I do find it quite limiting in dating and finding people that dont have a problem either with me being POZ, OR being seen with a POZ person...crazy, but some people are afraid of what thier friends will think or say....so just enjoy each day and appreciate each day, and know that your life HAS chaged a bit, and if you were anything like me prior to being POZ--I was used to having a good # of dates/not always leading to sex....but still looking with a positive attitude knowing there HAS to be another ALIEN out there waiting to meet me and go from there. Peace!

Hi CB,

I have been dating a wonderful man for the past 3 months. He is HIV+ and I am negative. I was grateful that he told me after the first date (when we decided we wanted a second date), because I respected his honesty and respect. From my point of view, there is no doubt that sharing your status info. on the first date is very important. Otherwise, if you wait to confide, the relationship might not progress. And let's be honest.....if a man does not want to pursue you based on your HIV status, do you really think you can change his mind just because you have a great smile, outstanding personality, or great pecs and biceps? Please be honest and both men will benefit from your candor. You look and sound like a GREAT catch!!!