Gay & Lesbian Teens Support Group

I know what you mean I told my dad that I was gay a lil over a month ago and he's just know talking to me. But I know with my dad I just let him deal with it and once in a while I would bring it up so that he knows this is who I want to be. The only way I got my dad to agree with me is agreeing with him about how this could or couldn't be a phase. One thing is that it's going to take a while. But until than u can chat with me:)

Hi there,

Oddly I had the same experience you did, I told my mother and father I was gay, through floods of tears and frantic worrying by both that i'd gotten a girl pregnant. (Haha.) My father hugged me tight and told me he was proud of me, and my mother said, "I'll always be your mother." Ever since my dad hasn't really cared, he said he was proud of me, and he's never shown any reason that he isn't.

My mother is a different story, she -does not- talk about it, she's a woman of belief, and I feel if I brought it up it'd be chaos. My two older brothers now know and both are most likely about to get married. However i've never brought a long term partner home, or introduced them. How can I? When my mother finds the subject so hard. That makes me hate myself, because I make her feel bad.

My advice to you is this, clearly before telling them, you had your rock, someone you talked to. A friend perhaps? Keep that person close, let your family get over the initial shock and remember this, being gay isn't all you are. You are a remarkable individual with many other aspects to your personality. Why should you be careful what you talk about? If you are having relationship trouble, do your siblings go to your parents? I know if I was straight I wouldn't ask my parent's advice.

Still, I do know how you feel, so listen, test the water if you really want to know, it may sound a bit immoral but I made up a story about one of my friend's coming out and being disowned by my parents, it made my mother angry and kinda rallied her to my side. She went on about how some people don't deserve children, but it showed that no matter how she 'feels', I know she accepts me.

Sure that's not the best way to go about it, but test the water, talk to them, tell them your anxiety. But don't be mad at them, and don't assume they'll be upset. They didn't disown you after all, they'll come to terms with it. And just keep in mind, there's more to you than who you love.