Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group

So, you don't have any reason to stop, eh? OK, I'll try to explain to you what is gonna happen if you continue to gamble, at least this is what happens to most of us.......

...... First, make no mistake about it, you're going to lose. These games are all set up to take your money, the odds are stacked against you, the longer you continue to play the greater the chances that the odds are gonna "catch up to you". Even if you happen to win a bit, you'll lose it back again, trying to win even more.
Now that you've lost a bunch of money, you're likely to fall into the trap of "chasing"......trying to win back the money you've already lost. This will not work, you'll lose even more.
Your obsession with gambling will grow. You'll gamble more often, you'll bet higher bets, you'll try new games........the result will remain the same, you'll continue to lose.
Soon, your gambling will outclass your income and you'll find youself not paying your bills, not having any money to go on vacations or to reward yourself for your daily work. Your overdraft will grow, you'll max out your credit cards, you'll borrowq from friends and family, your debys will grow and grow. All your savings will be gone. You'll need car repairs, dental work, new clothesw for work........ but all your money will committed to servicing your debt and more gambling. You'll develop an attitude of "I'll do it "next payday"....... but "next" never comes.
You'll develop new talents that you never had before....... you'll learn to cheat, lie, deny, decieve, con, steal, juggle the books, make up excuses........whatever it takes to get the cash to keep gambling. This is the part where the emotional damage really begins......You'll learn about shame (of the type of person you've become), guilt (about what you're doing), self-loathing, anger, frustration, confusion, bafflement (How could I do this?). Your sleep will be affected, so will your diet. Your physical health will deteriorate. You'll isolate from your friends and family, your personal relationships will suffer. Your ability to talk to others will diminish, you'll lose sensitivity to others problems, your professional relationships and your ability to deal with stress will be battered.
Eventually, your friends and family, unable to understand or help, will walk away from you. You'll grow unemployable and there's a good chance you'll be terminated or quit.
You'll be unable to pay rent or mortage and be forced to rely on others to keep a roof over your head....... "others" will soon grow sick of being used this way...... you could easily end up homeless.
The banks and credit card companies and collection agencies will hunt you ceaselessly...... you'll know no peace, you won't be able to answer your phone, your car will be repossessed........
Finally, once everything is lost, you'll come to understand what "bottom" means. Your entire life, everything you studied and worked for, your family, friends, career, future, mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health, your financial well being, all your hopes and all your dreams.........IT"S ALL GONE!!!......... No hubby, no children, no family, no home....... it's all been gambled away, a few coins at a time.

"Don't know if you want to stop?"....... I'll suggest that you read some of the stories of the peole here on this site and listen to what happened to some of us. We didn't want to stop either. Without exception, it didn't work out well for ANY of us.
If this scenario I've laid out for you seems cold, cruel, and heartless, if it scares you, if it appears to be a terrible outlook, if it seems harsh and unfeeling and extreme......... then I've made my point, that's what I'm trying to express. Gambling addiction is a deadly, destructive disease and it always seems to get worse, never better........unless we stop gambling and stay stopped. I know of no other solution.
Still looking for that "reason"?...... You're young, talented, educated....... you've got a great life to look forward to, you'll be able to help a lot of people as you live your life and you deserve much more than you're ever gonna find in a casino. Give yourself a break, you're worth it......... just for today, do not gamble.

What he said ;O) Seriously though, I've never met Eastwester but I'm pretty sure he knows me well by what he wrote. I was lucky though that I realized what was happening at the Developing New Talents paragraph. Even so, I live EVERY Single Day knowing that all our financial issues are my fault. I NEVER thought I'd turn 40 and not be able to pay for dental work, doctor bills, insurance, etc., etc., etc.

You posted at this site, so you don't need an excuse to quit. The fact that you cared enough about yourself to even try says enough. You are worth it!

Bella, In order to stop gambling, you have to start giving. Please try to donate, doesn't matter how little, money to charities or a friend in need. I am telling you this because that is how i beat the cravings. Deep down i am still a gambler, but a recovering one. Stop chasing your losses and try to live from day to day. A day gamble free, is an achievement in itself. I hope and believe that you can do it since the worest of the worst gamblers such as me could do it. I will keep you in my prayer.
Carraa!

bella welcome. Like me you've realised you have a problem when you're fairly young. For me, I found this incredibly upsetting because all of my friends gamble, they either gamble socially or regularly, and I did not know why I wasn't able to control myself. I was addicted to betting on sports as well. I could not watch a sport, even if it was my team, without having a bet or thinking about a bet I could put on. Eastwesters post pretty much sums it up. "You're going to lose." Now, I think the only way this would not be true is if you had one bet in your lifetime, it won, and you stopped and never bet again. But if you think about it, the more you bet, the better the odds are you will eventually lose. Betting agencies thrive on this and it's the reason they operate.

You say you don;t have a reason because you don't need to do it for your family. How about doing it for yourself. I don't know about you, but gambling for me depressed me. I used to think it gave me a thrill, but now that I have not gambled for a while, I realise that it is just an upsetting, laborious task that takes up all of my time and money. Admit to yourself that you have a problem, and give yourself a better life. Take the first step and not gamble for today and see how you feel. Change for you, if not for any else.

HI Bella ..Congrats on 'becoming a New Nurse.
'Your new career focus. Being there ,'responsible, accountable and reliable .
Gambling took all of those 'assetts from me ' my ''finances..
Also when I 'was gambling I did not 'pay attention to detail.. My mind was on my last bet 'then to the next bet while on the job.
Be well I hope You find help before jeorprodizing new 'career .
Sandra gams5.

Dear nurse Bella: I happen to be a nurse too. Believe me, It's not a good feeling when you just got paid and before the day is over your whole paycheck is gone and you barely have enough gas in your tank to get home. One moment you have all this money in your hand and the next minute you have nothing, and you have to wait two full weeks for another check, just to do exactly the same. I hope you listen to us before you get to this point.

Bella, welcome. Congratulations on your nursing degree. I am 45 and have been really struggling with gambling for the last three years. I too have no one to answer to but myself financially, and I understand that can make it easier, not having to explain to anyone where the money has gone. What I've realized, though, is that I was gambling with my future. My future vacation, my future new shoes, my future car repairs, the future Christmas gift for my family, and my future retirement. My advice to you is to set some goals for things to do with your new professional income - long term and short term. Like Eastwester says, reward yourself. Real rewards, not cash that passes briefly through your hands until you place the next bet. When I decided to quit gambling in August, I set a short term goal to go to Hawaii in November - and I'm going! I spend more money on social outings with friends, I have some new clothes, and I can afford to give really good gifts when I'm invited to a wedding - instead of looking for something on sale so I can put more into the slots. It's hard to keep myself out of the casino, I had one relapse, but I have had a great income for the last four or five years (finally, after years of night school and hard work), and for the first time I am actually enjoying the fruits of that income -and it's only been a few months! I feel really positive about not being broke, not worrying that the cat will get sick and I can't pay the vet, that one of my "almost adult" kids will call with a financial emergency of their own and I won't be able to help out. I am even planning the purchase of my first home - that is one of my long term goals.

So, yes, it's your money. But maybe there is a future family. I just find that works for me, when I tell myself to stop gambling with my future - and you have a long future ahead of you. Make it a good one, because money isn't everything, but it sure helps when you have enough of it. All the best to you!