What is Gambling Addiction
Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as f...
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Had been doing well until last night
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I am a compulsive gambler. I visit this support group daily reading all the Gambling Addiction posts but I have never posted anything until today. I had been doing well, not going to the Casino then yesterday I went - stayed about 8 hours. Lost quite a bit of $. Today I feel horrible. One promise I made to myself a while back was that I would be honest with my family about going to the Casino - so today I have to call my daughters and let them know that once again I was at the Casino and once again I lost $. I so want to never gamble again. I understand it is an addiction, and I realize that I do not have control of my common sense when it comes to the Casinos. When I go to the Casino, I have a beer or two or three. I know now that this just fuels the gambling. I really do not drink much except when I go to the Casino. I have been telling friends and family that I am doing well with this addiction - have it under control - or so I thought, then boom last night. I am "beating" myself up over this. I have tried GA meetings and did not feel comfortable in that setting. I see a counselor but tell her only what I want her to hear - sort of like telling friends and family I am doing OK. I want to stop. I have read many stories of advice on this support group - it worked for a while and yesterday I threw it all out the window, went to the Casino and did exactly what I say I do not want to do. I am a smart woman, why can't I be smart about the Casinos? Most of you have been successful - I want to be gambling free just like you. But I am struggling.
Posted on 11/06/09, 12:11 pm |
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KKristine --- I am struggling right along with you. You are not alone. I've been a member since May yet I only have about 3 weeks gamble-free under my belt right now. I think you are heading in the right direction --- joining this site, seeking and asking for help and support. You've come to a great place that is full of wonderful advice from people that have proven that this addiction can be arrested... One day at a time! Welcome 
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I'm gonna comment on the GA meeting part of your post.........
Recovery from a compulsive gambling addiction requires CHANGE in the person affected by the disease........ In my experience it is not possible to simply stop gambling and continue to live our life as we always have and to continue along with our old habits and behaviors.......if we try this, as you've shown us, we end up back in the same old places doing the same old things and the cycle starts again. At Gamblers Anonymous, we learn how to make these required changes in ourselves. Often, these changes are quite profound, we are forced to see things from a different perspective, to find new priorities, to realize unpleasant truths about ourselves, and to take steps toward doing something about them........ this sometimes makes us feel "not comfortable'. But we need to ask ourselves, "Do I have any other options that have worked for me?" "Am I ready to do whatever it takes to get free of this cursed addiction?" "Is the discomfort of the meeting bad enough to make me continue on the road to disaster instead?" My friend, the discomfort will pass, sooner than to might think. Myself, today I look forward to the meetings I attend, I've built new, real relationships there, all my friends are there, I have a good time at my meetings. I've heard it said, "If you're not enjoying the meeting, that shows that you're in the right place.....it's working.....keep coming back"
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I fell of the wagon myself. I am going to my first GA meeting tomorrow, forcing myself throught the discomfort. It's more uncomfortable not to go now.
I completely relate to the counselor, I am great at telling them what they want hear, I am too good at I think, to where I start believeing it a bit, if that makes sense. I too thought I had it under control, but in reality it controls us. We can do this together, we can regain control of this addiction. We can become gamble free. You fell down, ok, it happened, let's pick ourselves, dust ourselves off and begin again. Good Luck
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Hi Kristine I know exactly how you feel- I have done the same exact steps you GA meetings as well as a counselor- I am very new to this site but not new at gambling I ddid again last night and today of course I felt sad and depressed but I always think okay I will start again to try to get controll over this I m always asking the Lord to help me he has started in a way to take the craving of going and make it less intense- I was not happy last night as I was gambling so I am trying to stay strong and positive about this problem I have and to try to heal what is causing me to be so irresponsible with my finances I am will say a prayer for you along with everyone else who is struggling with this addiction.
Blessings ntta
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Thanks ntta,
The support is graet.
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May the Lord Bless and Keep You Safe. Lean on us and Him Kristine. He will never forsake or leave you. When you have those feelings again, tell Him, and tell Him exactly how you feel and that you want it to stop. You can do this and so can I. I have been gamble free since May 2009. Come on girlio, LET'S KICK IT! xoxoxoxoxo mamabear21
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Thanks to all of you for your support - I am 4 days with NO GAMBLING. Feeling better. I know I have a long way to go - but I am determined and with your support I am sure I will STAY GAMBLE FREE. I have friends and family who are supporting me through this also - I am so greatful to be this blessed in life.
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I went out Monday... had a couple hours of free time and barely made it out... I had to pull myself away twice and finally made it out of the Casino.. I have signed the self_ban for a year... I still go... I could actually get arrested.... My partner trusts me and I create alibi's for him. I know that I can only not gamble for today.I can call someone for support that understands, I have no will power when it comes to gambling, if I did I would leave when I win.. makes sense to me. But I don't. My sane thinking goes out the window when it come to gambling.
I am powerless all right. Thanks for sharing, it helps....
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