Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group

Carpie....you're not a failure! You slipped...it happens. You're human, not a robot.

Remember those games we played as kids? If a play went badly and no one could decide if they were out or not....someone would yell out "DO OVER"...just to get the game going again.

So....erase it....call "do over"....and take it one day at a time.

The fact that you want to stop and you see the pokie obsession as a problem is a blessing! I think most video games....gambling or otherwise...have a hypnotic lure. Hard to peel yourself away once you get started.

I'm the wife of a CG....who still isn't exactly sure he is one. He claims he wants to stop and stay away from the casino, but he keeps going back....then when I find out about it, he minimizes...."oh I only go once every week or so...and just for 20 or 30 minutes...and I only gamble my side income...a couple of hundred here or there. I only hide it because I know it upsets you when I go there."

Carpie....the biggest frustration for ME...is simply not getting the truth.

If my H came to me and said...."Crud...I'm sorry. I haven't gone in a month, and I went back again. This is how much I gambled." Just getting that news from him face-to-face instead of having to bust him or ferret it out....would be a relief. That gesture demonstrates respect and a desire to be held accountable. A little truth...even if it is painful...goes a long way.

Also...if my H would tell me a plan of what he intends to do DIFFERENTLY to avoid a slip....see a counselor, go to GA, have a phone buddy to call when he feels weak...that would be music to my ears! I hear that he recognizes he needs to examine his motives and look inside himself....but I never hear how he intends to conquer this problem. Knowing a "game plan" would be nice on my end...shows he's trying to be proactive instead of reactive.

I am very proud of you...for coming to DS...and just admitting you want to stop and live life differently. THAT IS HUGE!!!

You can do this, Carpie. Don't give up on yourself.

Oh, canterville, you are so spot on when you say the machines "have a hypnotic lure". And also when you say "A little truth...even if it is painful...goes a long way".

Carpie - you are not a failure. Never give up...start over, you did it before, you can do it again.

I'm in the same boat... but I'm starting to tape record myself... in the hours and days that follow Gambling... and discuss ... how I feel at that very moment... The feeling passes... But I always can remember better if I talk about it into my Iphone recorder app... Tape recorders or other ways... might help you... its helping me.

Slipping is common. Stick to your plan starting today... don't gamble. You can do it. Don't give up. I slipped at one month too. Hang tough, start over, remember how good you were doing.

Hugs.

Oh but this has happened to me alot- it makes me sick to have to start over but that is what you gotta do- the relapse is done-- move forward. If you went a month- here is to another month plus a day(and many more!) you can do it

We all know the dialogue that goes on in our minds when trying to stop gambling and fighting the urge to go "just one last time". The last time was the one last time! You know it doesn't matter if you won or lost. (Or won, and gave it all back!) it's not about winning or losing. It's about the Trance! the "forget the world exists" feeling! find something else that does this for you. Meditate. Watch a movie. Yoga. go for a walk. Go to Home Depot!!! anything, to take your mind off of it. Each day gets easier. Every time you slip, it gets harder to get back on the wagon! wouldn't it be nice to get rid of the gut retching feeling you get after you have gambled??