Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group

Marbleman, I am thankful for your reply to this dicussion. This month marks 3.5 months since my divorce from my CG husband. We were married for 16+ years. I was like you, but my husband did not display your wife's honesty, nor admit he had/s a problem.

Now that we are divorced, he does his thing, I do mine. He is still gambling (but he told me yesterday he only does it on Tuesday's and Thursday's). When we talk now, we are civil to one another. Neither of us have expectations of the other... makes it easier on everyone.

I will admit, his gambling is not something I would have chosen for him or our marriage. But he did. At this point in my life the man I married and love/d (still do - but love can be done at a distance) was never able to come to terms with himself and his addiction.

So, I now over 1/2 a century in age, I am raising our disabled son, am working to pay off debt encurred in marriage (yes, by CG - the settlement we worked out did not cover all his debt that was done in my name) and I work.

But I and our son do not live in the chaos, the control, the fear of 'what will happen when I walk in the door,' the moods, the lies, the theivery, the torment, etc., etc., etc.

I know my divorce is still fresh. I'm taking life one day at a time... I am not promised tomorrow and yesterday is gone. I am just living in today - and making the best of it with what I have.

Thanks again for the post. debs

I read somewhere that having big financial indescretions are the same as an affair to the spouse. Think about it, the betrayal is huge (atleast in my house), and financial security (or at least keeping your head above water) is one of the core securities an individual needs. A gambling addiction can, especially in this economy, send a family home to a "car".

I am no authority, this is the first week in many that I have not been to a casino. My beliefs on this topic are one of the big reasons I ham seeking recovery.

I think what finally hit me was realizing, I had spent a portion of both my daughter tuition, and our mortgage payment last month. Add to this my husbad said (yelled) "I am going to a job everyday that I hate with the fear that we cannot pay our bills, and then you blow it at the casino." I am killing him inside, he hates his existance as I have created it. That isn't fair.

Well admr I understand what you said about your husband but while feeling bad by spending so much money and how it is tearing him up inside, I can't speak for your husband but I can speak for mine and I honestly believe in my case it is used against me every chance he gets. Don't get me wrong I feel so bad I can't stand it about the money and he knows that, and that makes it very easy for him when he says the mean hurtful things he does to me. I wish he loved me enough to help me, which I have asked many times but his answer is for me to leave.