Saturday March 8, 2014
I believe this is the first Journal entry I have written. On Dec. 12th I fell and fractured my ankle and tore some ligaments. No surgery was needed to set the break. Because I live alone and because my other leg is very weak I was literally non- weightbearing for 3 months while I was in rehab. I am now back to walking but it is very painful on the rest of my body. My...
AdvertisementI'm so sick and tired of everything...Like i really am..
I'm alone 95% of the time... I don't have friends in real life...expect for my "best friend" who barely even bothers to keep contact with me. I'm always the one to call her. Not to mention she laughs at me constantly, even when it's about something serious.. I barely even have friends online...Most of the day i am alone. I don't see anyone...
I am very sorry that I have not responded to hugs and messages. I have been thinking of my DS friends and wanted to but have been in so much pain that I have been unable to because of the terrible almost non stop migraines and head pain I have been suffering with. I also feel very badly depressed and broken and lonely. My anxiety is high and I have&nbs...
I try to explain to her i am trying to believe in her, but her words and sentence's just make it harder seems nothing add's up , why would a married woman sit in a parking lot surrounded by co-workers talking to a estranged man she only works with,about her home life?
i am really having a hard time grasping at this, she fails to give me insight , for petes sake he calls her cutie WTF? whats he ca...
1 word for today N U M B !When does she see this? humiliated and betrayed ...when does it sink in and she gets it ?
when the guilt pass's over for what 1 had done words she had said to him? why sit and talk with someone and tell 1 story? my distence from her was because of her not i ,
she made OUR marriage the way it was i didn't i went for the ride she don't get she pushed me away at all over the years ...
It hurts knowing that the asshole she was having an affair with is at work right now at this moment as i am typing she called to see what i was doing but failed to say who all showed up for volunteer work until i asked !! i am so livit and my mind is racing
when i spoke with her she gave me nothing positive to hold on to , un fucking real my mind just wont stop
she creates this shit i'm tir...
Captains log day 2
I guess when you pour your heart out ...and speak as you feel
and nothing changes what do you do? ..leave and find peace or stick it out
It seems before her so called affair things were ok but we werent intimate
but since this all came about ...i have not been the same ..she puts no effort..into us ..seems work bill's and tax's are on her priority...
She claims to be numb , she claims to be ..physically tired ect: for me or to show her love
but however she was never to tired to call him and chase after him !! go figureOk here it is last nights dream:
You came home from work and realized i was not here, you went to the bedroom where you found the note picked it up and read it and it said:
I am sorry to do this , i feel like you do not love me any longer...you make no effort to make us go on stronger..you say you have no strength and your feeling numb, only because you let all the issues come between one