Fibromyalgia Support Group

Sorry, that was much longer than I meant for it to be. When I start typing my mind drifts and gets away from me and I share much more that I intended to.

You can write as much as you want :) I'm recently at home due to not being able to work at my job. I'm almost 50. I worked 60 hours a week at a physically demanding job. I never called in sick. I took a day off here or there. Took my vacation. Ultimately, I just left one day about a month ago and I can't go back. Trying to get disability isn't the easiest. I've posted on the forum about getting disability and get a variety of mostly discouraging answers. Mostly, don't expect to go back to work.

I'm not that kind of person. I am going to go back to work in a few months after resting. Not at my old job, but I will. I'm not one to just crumble and say, oh, boo hoo, I have FM. Yes, lots of people don't think you have it. It's almost embarrassing to tell people. I say I have chronic pain. Let them think what they want.

In your case, I would get some medication for your mental issues. You need to be more clear for work. Even if you physically can't get out of bed, you need to have mental clarity to be able to do your job. If you feel better mentally, you will start to feel better physically. I wouldn't worry about the bipolar, etc. So many people have mental issues that are treated with medication. I doubt many employers look at that. I'm not even sure they are even allowed to ask that. I wouldn't tell them that for sure.

There are a lot of different treatment options out there for FM. Changing your diet, medications, chiropractic, homeopathic. My husband found a guy in Seattle where we live, he's a chiropractor, that has success with fibro with some kind of neuro treatments. I'm going to look into that.

I think you are far too young to be sitting around at home in bed all day trying to work. If your career aspirations are demanding, you need to get yourself in better physical condition.

The fog you have is highly annoying. I get more forgetfulness than foggy. I write lots of notes and put reminders in my phone with alarms. It's hard to concentrate at times. I have to focus a lot and I can't multitask like I used to. Oh well. I'm getting old anyways :)

And make sure you HAVE fibro and haven't been misdiagnosed. I made my doctor do all the tests for MS, Lupus, etc. It's important that you have a doctor that believes in what you believe. You can't be going to a doctor that doesn't believe in fibromyalgia. I know you said you don't have any medical right now, but your doctor may be able to work out an arrangement with you in order for you to be seen. Mine did.

Do you have any family or friends you can talk to? It's nice to have someone around to help you out from time to time.

I would try and get on some meds right now for your mental issues in order to get clear. Find something that doesn't make you more foggy. Look up diet changes. Try and do some yoga. That's supposed to help. I haven't yet, but it's on the list :) Try chiro or massage. You have to try things to see what works for you because not everything works for everyone.

I hope this helps you some. I felt TERRIBLE yesteryday. I had some people over Saturday and did too much and ate bad food and I paid for it all Sunday. Today is better, but it'll take me a few days to bounce back. Never used to. But I think after a couple more months of rest, I will go back to some kind of work. Sitting around all day at home is boring and I'm broke! LOL

Keep your chin up! Things can always be worse, and you can still do what you want to do!!

So sorry that fibro demons captured your soul. The work thing is hard at any age. My career got wiped away at age 50. I could no longer work. Since I saw that fibro was returning, I put away money with the plan that I'd have money to live with for several years. I understand that's not always an option though.

I was living with my girlfriend at the time, The 2 of us had a plan set in place on how I could survive, then wooooosh, plans changed.

Plan for the worst, then hope for the best. Fibro does not discriminate because of age. I was hit hard around 20-21 and couldn't work for nearly 2 years at that time.

Do you your best to continue to have a job you can work from home. I was self-employed most of my working years. In my mind I can still do my job, continue thinking of ways to improve what I used to do, but I can't physically work. The remnants of my job is done online.

I spent my early years with fibro fighting it, chasing the cures, visiting doctors, ect. This time around I personally will not, cannot do it again. Be careful on your fibro journey. Chasing the cure can become an obsession like anything else. It becomes just as bad as fibro itself. Look for ways that can ease your symptoms. It's all a personal journey that we all handle differently.

Bi-polar is serious stuff. I understand there are different degrees. Medication can help, but there is a catch to having the diagnoses on your records. The good side is it can help with a disability claim. The bad part is if you are not diagnosed it correctly, it nearly impossible to remove from your records. I went through al this with my now 22yo daughter.

I know its hard but try to think of positive things, I know at times you want to scream. You are doing good so far and in time things will get better, maybe tomorrow will be a better day. You know how fibro goes pretty good days then bad days.

Thanks for the advice, everyone. It was helpful and I really appreciate it. I've always tried to stay optimistic but, as you all know, it gets really hard sometimes. I just finished working my 8 hour shift and it was hard but I just kept pushing through and telling myself that I would not quit or give up. "Just last a little bit longer and take it from there," I told myself.
I am going to continue to do anything and everything I can to keep from even considering disability an option. I agree that I'm too young to have to work from a bed all day. I'm taking a lot of supplements now (Magnesium, B12, etc) and I want to start some sort of exercise regiment because I just (mentally) feel like I would feel better if I was in better shape again but I (physically) feel like any sort of exercise would destroy any progress I am making right now.
I'm going to try to contact my doctor tomorrow and see how much it would cost to have him see me about what he thinks we might can do about the bipolar and the fog. I think part of the reason that I don't want him to diagnose me is that I've always been one to say 'i am not sick' and go to work with a 103 fever as if being denial will make it go away. Doing that with FM for a long time didn't work for it...I think maybe I'm really just doing the same thing with my bipolar diagnosis. I tell my doctor I don't have it and hope it just goes away and I start doing better but it doesn't go way and I don't just start doing better.
He has done lots and lots of tests and sent me to several specialists. I know he believes in FM because he's the one that told me about it but I will ask again if there is anything else he can test for.
My whole extended family knows due to the fact that if one knows, everyone knows and I've told a few of my closer friends but I still don't really feel like they really understand much less relate to what's going on so I mostly just keep it to myself unless someone calls and asks if I've better yet to which I reply 'not really'
I have one cousin who actually did a lot of research on it when she found out that's what my doctor said was wrong and I think she understands better than anyone else (and sometimes suggests possible holistic treatments) but I don't really get to talk to her very often.

Just wanted to give an update so here it is. I did go to the Dr yesterday and he has started me on a new medication for the pain as well as medication for Bipolar so I am hopeful that over the next couple of weeks I might see some improvement.

Hi, I just wanted to say that I am also Bipolar. It should not affect your job aspirations. You are not required to tell your employer your medical conditions unless you require some kind of accommodation under the ADA.

I had to quit working last November. In January I applied for a VA pension and it was approved last month. I am also applying for SSDI. I will let you know how it goes.

Thanks I appreciate you letting me know!!

You sound like me, I spent the first 9 years chasing a cure, hoping and beleiving that I could beat this and I would get better. Then I went for the mind over matter logic...pain is not tangible so messages recieved now ignore it and get on with my day. Well, my body rejected that and I returned to work and worked myself to such a painful and severe point of exhaustion that my epilepsy reared it's ugly head. As my pattern seems to play out, when I am off I focus all my energy on getting back to work and then get back, then I focus all my energy on staying at work then crash and burn.
Now, my doc coldly told me, "you will not get better, this will probably get worse" That crushed me.
I spoke to a great counsellor today, who dug through my pride and my sarcasm to the root of my problem. I just can't accept not working. When I mentioned my work today my daughter replied "you don't work though mom, you are never there". That was like a stab in the heart. That is how much I can not bare the thought of not working the humiliation and lack of self respect. I know it is stupid that we define ourselved by what we do but we do define ourselves by that even if we do not define others by such standards.
This counsellor in less than an hour figured out that although I am logical, I bubble think when it comes to expectations of myself. That perhaps I need to accept I may not be returning to work. I can;t even type -will not- because it just does not seem real. I just can't accept that all my struggling was for not.
I suppose one day at a time is how I have to think. Not worry about my financial ruin, living on 65 percent of my current pay with no increases equals poverty in about 5 years time. When I think that way I get so anxious I panick and think I have to beat this I have to get back to work, even for short periods of time to keep my pay increase but if I can't cut it over and over again, I am sure they will jsut fire me eventually. I have to keep trying for 19 more years until retirement. I just need the docs to fix me and I can go back to work and the cycle continues.
So, do what you can well you can. Don't worry about tomorrow. When the day comes you will know, when you know your working years are through be honest with yourself and save yourself the head games I am currently putting myself through.
As for being bipolar, that is something to take care of. It will probably help reduce some of your stress to if your are medicated. It is a disability under law, they CAN NOT penalize you for it, nor should you have to disclose it for most jobs.
Fibro does not discriminate but it does change your life. We can't always control the people we are with or the situations we are in but we can control ourselves, never give up that control:)

Keep writing!

I'm on disability, and, yes, it is hard to get disability without the medical evidence that shows your disability assessment. It can be done.

The fog is often less overwhelming when I stay hydrated, so I keep water around. I practice flowing into the movement to help ease the change of the body parts and that helps reduce the pain impact of the motion.

We have to give ourselves time to vent, and that helps us heal.

So, yes, we have changes, and we are stronger due to those changes.

Best wishes on a successful day!