Families & Friends Affected By Suicide Support Group

Due to my own self confidence issues and my ex partners struggles with commitment and emotions the hardest thing I have to live with is the fact that I never said to him face to face that I loved him........something I regret with all my heart and now wake up daily doing even though he is sadly no longer with us.......If I could turn the clock back, when we first started dating and he told me he was falling in love with me I wish with all my heart I had said the same back to him :( xxx

I love you! and to really mean it!

I love you,you are the best thing that happen to me.i mean it from the bottom of my heart

My daughter was extremely fortunate and lived due to the circumstances.

I want to tell her now..

'I would give you my heart and soul to make your pain go away. I love you so much.'

I said it all. A lot. I love you. You're beautiful. God gave you so many talents, you beat all the odds being born alive, you have a purpose. Please don't ever try this again, it frightens me so badly. I kissed, I hugged, I treated her like an eight year old. I put aside my life, literally, for 14 years as her illness began to emerge and worsen. I lived in isolation with her. Everything I did was for her. I spent no money on myself, it was always for her. I was there during all her hospitalizations, bringing her food, stuffed animals, a DVD player, an iPod. I stood between her and death, literally. None of it mattered. None of it worked.

i could be here all day but the main bit would be "i love you, your one of the people i can actually call a true friend"

You mean the world to me. You are devastatingly talented and gorgeous and you are the sweetest guy I've ever met. I didn't know you were suicidal or even depressed but if I had known... There probably would have been nothing I could have said or done. You barely knew I existed.

My 13 year old self would have said all those things. My 25 year old self has lived and loved again but my heart still breaks in the month of May.

Why? What happened? I know there are horrible secrets, but what happened to you guys?
2 people in my family shot themselves in the head a few years apart. My Grandmother tried and failed to OD at least 3 times I know of. What the hell are the secrets?
-Also our now non existent family misses you and wish you both wouldve let me and my father in. My fathers an AMAZING man, hes my hero, and they shut him out too which I know broke his heart. I would tell them, even though my father doesnt say it ever, he doesnt talk about the past, that I know he misses them and each person took a piece of him when they left. People think problems die with them, and its not true. We carry on their burdens and hurts.
I still remember one of the "memorial services"...my grandparents (dead now) actually had an open casket...she shot herself in the head! I saw through the makeup the bullet hole under her chin.
Id say they hurt me a lot, and Im angry...but they hurt my Dad the most, and that I cant ever let lie. He has a heart of gold.
Sorry for the anger and no "I love you's"...Im still very angry and want to know what the hell happened so horrible to my family to create this brutal outcome. I wish they couldve been strong enough to talk instead of this. Now theres nothing.

Yankees8, it was decided to have an open casket for my step-son also. He shot himself behind his right ear. I had to stand by the head of his casket during the visitation so no one would touch his head. People do weird crazy things just to find out stuff. I had to do this b/c no one else could/would and I'm such a "strong" person they say. Little does anyone know what that did to me mentally. Hours and hours of standing there on guard. Not 1 1/2 feet from his head. It was 5 days before we could bury him due to the autopsy, Thanksgiving and whatever. Standing that close he had begun to smell even though he'd been embalmed and that also has done something to me mentally. I'm so strong they say. I get sick to my stomach just thinking about the things that happened. I'm not strong. they should have closed it. I will never be the same. Ever.

Elzeena, we too did everything we could for this young man. His father paid his bills even though he made around $3,600/month. He spent his money on what he wanted and never had anything. (Let me get these $110 boots and $60 knife, never mind the water bill). We supported him emotionally and every other way possible. He promised he wouldn't do anything. He didn't drink, didn't do drugs. He promised his father. But, in the end nothing else mattered except getting out. He had done things that he was going to be held responsible for legally and he wanted out. So, he did what he felt he had to do.

If I could say anything to him it would be "Don't do this. You kill everyone when you kill yourself. You're father will die. Our marriage will die. Your daughter will die. Your sister's and your nephews. Your grandparents. Every body you know will die when they find out." Because it's like that. Everyone died when he did because we are not recognizable as the same people anymore and it is a sad, sad thing. No one will ever be happy or the same again. Ever.

It's been 19 months.

I would say to my Bubba " I believe in you! I know you are stronger than the addiction and trust you will make it through!!" I want you to come home bubba!!