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I'm losing my daughter!!
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I don't know what to do. I've cried till I can't cry anymore. So depressed. My daughter who is 23, is engaged to a jerk. She still lives at home, has a job, but will be leaving soon as fiance finds a house. We raised her in church, but she is considering "shacking up" with this guy. Can't talk to her, she won't listen. Only gets angry. So, I've stopped talking. She's stopped talking. I won't allow fiance's name to be spoken in this house. There's so much more I can say, but not enough room to write it. Husband is worried about me. I can't sleep, can't eat and i go through each day in a daze. I don't want to lose her, but I know I have to let her go. Never experienced this kind of pain in all my life. Please help.
Posted on 02/12/09, 01:08 pm
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Reply #1 - 02/13/09  10:20am
" I am sooo sorry my sister what you are going thru. It's very hurtful when you want your children to grow happy and they want to do their own thing. You raised her in church(I know that feeling), than they do the opposite of what you beleive. God says in his word to train up a child while they are youg and they will not depart from it. Just like the prodical son, show your daughter mercy and grace even when you feel she is wrong. It is time to let go and let God(easier said than done.) It's time to reay and seek God. Please don't have too harsh words when she leaves. Be supportive without judgement. I made that mistake and my only son doesn't speak to me. Pray for direction of how to speak to her. I'll be praying for you too. "
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Reply #2 - 02/14/09  4:30pm
" I know exactly what you're going through. My daughter is 23 and looking for a home to move into with her boyfriend. Like you, I raised her differently. We had some horrible arguments a couple of times, and I was in despair. I finally realized I had to get myself into "acceptance" --- that doesn't mean I approve --- my daughter knows just how I feel. But I was determined not to let this circumstance destroy my relationship with my only child. I had to give the situation to God. My daughter and I are getting along as well as we ever have --- she knows I love her deeply, even though I disagree with her actions. I also signed up for an online program on depression --- this has helped me walk through my own sadness. And I just keep on praying, too. God knows my heart and my daughter's and He can heal all relationships. I'm putting my trust in Him.
God Bless You!
Kathy "
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Reply #3 - 02/16/09  7:10am
" i have 1 daughter and four sons - all grown up. i know how you are feeling. in time she will want to talk to you again. try to listen not judge and be there for her when it goes pearshaped with this guy. meantime take a bit of emotional distance and make time for you, be kind to you in small ways and don't shut down on your husband.

Marie x "
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Reply #4 - 02/17/09  10:05am
" This is the time to totally trust God. He is in control and He hears your prayers. Remember, God loves your daughter even more then you do. Keep praying, pray together with your husband. I cant imagine anything stronger then when parents pray for their chldren. Pull your self up and start acting like you trust God. When you start having negative thoughts, stop them when they start. Tell the devil your not going to listen to him, its in God's hands now and he can take it up with God because you know all good things work together to those who trust God. You cannot doubt and have faith at the same time, you eigher trust God with this situation or you dont. I know its hard to just stop worrying, but take it moment by moment. Start acting like you have faith; remember the joy of the Lord is your strength. The battle right now is in your thought life. we cannot see what will happen down the road, but God does. You cannot change anything by worrying over it, but you can change things by faith. I pray God gives you peace and pataince. One of the hardest things is waiting on God's time. We want things to happen now and if they dont we think nothings happening. Just because you dont see anything changing, God's hand is at work, His timeing is perfect. When you get down just stop and give God thanks and tell him you trust Him. "

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