What is Dyslexia
Dyslexia refers to any reading difficulty not associated with obvious problems (such as bad eyesight). Dyslexias include the inability to name letters, to read words or sentences, ...
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My Fiance has Dyslexia and I'm kinda troubled..
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A little about me: They only medical problems I have are Anxiety and Epilepsy. I love English and can get kinda irritated if a word is spelt majorly wrong.
BUT...I am engaged to the most AMAZING man I have ever met, and he has Dyslexia, depression, Bi-polar, and many other medical problems. His Dyslexia is really bad, his spelling is really bad, sometimes to the point where I can't understand the words, and he has alot of trouble reading. I have no problem with him struggling to read or understand what some of the words mean, I usually help him out with that. My problem is his spelling. He is already paranoid about it and there are times when we will be talking to eachother on AIM ( we aren't currently in the same state) and I correct his spelling. Then I feel horrible afterwards cuz I know he did the best he could. Now he is coming out of a psychiatric ward after being there for about 3 months for getting very suicidal and he went into a coma just last week, he woke up a matter of days later, but I know he will be even more paranoid about his spelling now that he hasn't been writing all that time. I don't really know what advice I'm looking for on this, ways to stop correcting him, or something, i don't know, but if someone could give me any ideas on what to do I would be very grateful! --Laura Posted on 09/14/09, 08:09 pm |
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It sounds like your Fiancé is at a very low point, and will need a lot of support. I am what I considered severely dyslexic, and although cannot for definite say what will help him, this is what I think. My spelling is atrocious but who cares, I am still a smart person as is I am sure your Fiancé is. I wouldn't like it if someone kept correcting my spelling. Be there to help him when he asks you how to spell something. Help him to believe that spelling isn't the " be all and end all of life." There are ways to get around it e.g." spell check." He most probably has a reading problem too. I use the program confident reader "http://www.confidentreader.com/index.htm" on the computer that reads all most ever thing to me aloud. The voice is a bit irritating at first but you get uses to it. Dyslexia its self sometimes makes it difficult for one to search for solutions to help with these problems, so it would be great if you as a non-dyslexic could help him find ways to get around some of the trials and tribulations, at the same time as not making him feel that you are lording it over him. Just try and be there for him. Hope this helps. 
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The problem that is overlooked by most people with respect to dyslexia. Is the emotional problems which can occur as a result of the chronic invalidation, emotional abuse and bullying that the dyslexic can experience at the hands of parents or other children.
I invite you to join a new group I started http://www.dailystrength.org/group...
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I am now over 40 and I still suffer from the emotional problems I aquired when I was at school with dyslexia.
This despite the fact that I can now spell quite well ( I learnt to spell from the spell checker), and I know enough numerical tricks so that numbers are not a problem for me anymore. My advice, go easy on him, and be clear with yourself that what you want most is to have a loving and giving relationship with him, not to 'help' him with his problems. It is only natural that you feel compassion for what he is going through but the best help you can give is to be 100% supportive of his efforts to help himself.
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I would try my hardest not to correct him. I know I am very touchy about my spelling and I get very upset when people who know me and know I can't spell correct me. I mean my own sister looked at me one day and said don't spell much huh? I was floored that she would say that to me. Thank God for spell check or half this post would be misspelled!!
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