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Discussion:
I've been holding in this secret for years now
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Well first of all, I'd like to say that I am new to this support group and I am really glad that I found it. I hope that being here can help me.

I know that this might sound a bit crazy but something happened to me when I was about 11 years old and it still haunts me to this day...

I went to a fair with my dad, uncle and cousin. There was a palm reader there and my cousin and I thought it would be fun to get our palms read, we didn't really think it would be that big of a deal. Well, when it was my turn the first thing this woman said was "you're going to live a very short life" and then she told me that I was going to have a happy marriage. But I can't help but to wonder, what if she made up the marriage thing so that I wouldn't feel so bad about living a very short life? And I'm not saying that I trust psychics or anything like that but sometimes I feel like she's right and that I won't even live long enough to get married. Because honestly I can't even imagine myself getting married, its something that I've tried to accept. I've never been in love before and I don't even know if I ever will truly fall in love. Its the thing that I want the most but it also scares me the most out of anything. I'm trying to live my life and be strong enough so that I can be somewhat happy with being alone if that's how I end up. But in my heart I feel like that woman might have been right, I don't really feel like there's a point to my life.

Thank you for reading
Posted on 02/26/10, 05:18 pm
12 Replies | Most Recent Add Your Reply
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Email me when others reply to this topic help
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Reply #1 - 02/26/10  5:21pm
" well, "short" is subjective. to some 80 is too short. to others 70 is too long. so...

having said that, i don't believe these psychics at the fair at all. i DO belive in psychics (so what?) but not the ones who operate out of a tent or a second floor walk-up. and i don't believe that sylvia brown woman... "
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Reply #2 - 02/26/10  5:23pm
" I am sure your fears are real to you and I respect that.

What if I told you I am a psychic and you are going to live a long and happy life and you will be happily married in due time?

I am not a psychic and neither was that woman who told you she was. Trust me. "
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Reply #3 - 02/26/10  5:29pm
" Palm reading has been around for centuries. That said, no one knows the future one hundred percent. I can imagine it is a scary thing to hear and like SA said, for some 80 is too short a life. If you go to another palm reader they may say something different. It's not a science, it's mystical based like astrology and even astrology has more science to it. "
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Reply #4 - 02/26/10  5:32pm
" wanderingvet: I understand where you are coming from on that, thank you. And I know it seems silly for me to believe that some palm reader at a fair could actually be right. But with our without the psychic in the picture I still feel like...like I don't know why I'm here. I try to be a good person and nice but sometimes I wonder if I was gone tomorrow how much would I truly be missed. "
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Reply #5 - 02/26/10  6:41pm
" So it sounds like the psychic factor is small .. it is how you feel psychic input or not.

You are pretty young .. don't know if that is a factor or not. It is common for young people to wonder 'what is my purpose'. That is fairly common. It is a question of degree .. you may be obsessing over the question .. or somehow taking it 'too far'. It is evidently troubling you quite a bit.

THIS IS NOT A CRITICISM .. just an observation .. it is a LITTLE unusual for a 22 year old to feel they have never been in love (yet). Typically, there are a couple of teen 'crushes' by then .. where they would claim they have 'been in love'. I might be making something out of nothing .. but that kinda 'stood out' to me. I want to emphasize .. there is nothing wrong if you have never been in love ... but I think that is a little bit atypical ... (but I am no expert on human behavior). Don't let it bother you .. it is simply something I took note of.

Here is my advice ... if you are reasonably happy with your life .. then there is no problem. If you have something that frequently bothers you and limits your happiness .. then you should discuss it with a qualified person and see what is goin on. That person would be a therapist, counelor, or psychologist. If you think it is limiting your happiness .. and have questions .. you owe it to yourself to get some answers.

There are several 'flags' in your post. The role of the psychic. Your feelings about the length of your life (with or without the psychic's input).

"Because honestly I can't even imagine myself getting married, its something that I've tried to accept. I've never been in love before and I don't even know if I ever will truly fall in love. Its the thing that I want the most but it also scares me the most out of anything."

This is the most perplexing thing you posted. Odd you cannot imagine/fantasize being married .. yet it is what you want the most, yet it scares you the most.

That is a lot of contradiction/conflict, .. and I think you need to explain this to a professional. LOT of conflict there .. whether it has to do with a visit to a psychic or not. I think you should talk it 'all out' with a professional .. and I think it is important for you to do that sooner than later. "
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Reply #6 - 02/26/10  6:43pm
" simplegirl, unless you live in a cloistered nunnery you never know if or when marriage-type love will land on you. And maybe even then it could happen. It could be stunning passion next week or something powerful in 20 years between two mature, sensible and caring people. Me, I was underage and had to get a guardian appointed by the court to sign the papers for me. And somehow it's lasted.

I know this is not supposed to be about my favorite subject, me, but I do want to tell you a story. When I was in high school a teacher was asking the students at what age they would die and how. Stupid thing to burden 17 year olds with. I answered 48 and later realized that was the average age of my two grandfather's deaths. Spooky. But 48 came and went and I'm still here. Later I found out that I had been mistaken about the age one of my grandfathers passed away at. Next month when I have my birthday I'll be the age of the new, recalculated average. Am I scared? Do I believe that I'll leave this existence over the next year? No and No. Do I care all that much? No. I'm happy to wait and see what happens.

Live your life, enjoy your life. Whether it's over for you next month or 75 years from now that's what you should do. "
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Reply #7 - 02/26/10  7:08pm
" Wanderingvet: Let me try to clear up this contradiction...

I do consider myself to be a hopeless romantic. And I would love to find somebody who truly loves me for me and brings out the best in me and me do the same for them. I've dated a few guys whom I thought I had something real with but then I ended up with a broken heart.

The reason why it scares me is not necessarily the "being in love" part. But right before you fall for somebody when you don't know if they feel the same way that you do. When you ask yourself is this gonna turn into something real or is it just gonna flop like all the others. THAT is what scares me...

Hope I cleared that up for you.

--------------------------------------------

I understand that you all are trying to help with this and maybe at the moment I am feeling a bit more sensitive than I usually am but I can't help but to feel like I am being judged for what I said. This was the first time I had ever admitted this secret to a group of people and the reason why I decided not to tell anyone was because I knew that people would think I was over-reacting to it. It's not like I think about that day at the fair everyday of my life, I don't obbsess over it. But it's just something that stays in the back of my head that I always think about whenever I am feeling down and depressed. And to be honest I'm starting to regret even bringing it up at all. "
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Reply #8 - 02/26/10  7:21pm
" I can understand why this would still be bothersome to you.

At that age, children are concrete in their thinking. They take whatever an adult says to be gospel. Of course, now that you are older, you have the reasoning skills to reason that this was crap, yet it still stays in a part of your mind. I totally get this. I really do.

Please don't feel badly for bringing this up. Actually, not very long ago someone brought up something very similar that they had been told by someone who was supposedly a psychic (or something similar) and she was scared out of her wits.

There are so many different people here and everyone "speaks" differently, if you know what I mean, but no one from what I see, is judging you hon. I, myself, am glad you had the strength to share this with us. I think it took a lot of courage to do so.

I hope you will stick around.....you will find that most everyone here is very nice....insane...but nice lol ;)

{{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}}} "
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Reply #9 - 02/26/10  7:28pm
" I can assure you no one is judging you .. we are trying to help. But here, you get amateur response. No offense meant, I assure you.

Looking for love/romance/marriage is risky .. many ways to get hurt. Happens all the time. But, for most, the risk is not preventive to seeking that happiness. The best defense for that, in my opinion, is not to FALL ..... anywhere. Be wise, be cautious, be objective, be wise .. couple common sense with the love emotion .. and your risks are reduced. With some mature thinking and wise considerations, you can minimize the risks. "
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Reply #10 - 02/26/10  7:28pm
" Kaino: Thank you for your kind words, I feel a lot better now. It totally makes sense to me about children having concrete thinking and then being able to reason with it as an adult but it still stays in the back of your mind. You hit the nail on the head with that one. Thank you

*HUGS* "

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