Depression Support Group

Possibly. I guess I could see the extra attention from another person as a reason to cheat. If there are self esteem issues, maybe.
Im miserable, low self esteem but I would never cheat.

probably can...the need to feel loved, and the act of being loved, is one of the greatest cures there are. the problem is it's so temporary, i think it eventually adds to the depression.

I can see the possibility. Depression = misery. Affairs = gratification (to some twisted extent). Depression ruins relationships. Affairs are 'new, unspoiled' relationships (at first).

Depressed people often have 'screwed up' relationships and an affair is a 'chance' at a lesser screwed up relationship at first.

Sort of like don't wash your car, get a new one.

I'm wondering on your side why it matters? Does it make it better that he has affairs because he is depressed? It's kind of like saying it's ok for a drunk to drive because he's an alcoholic.....

Why are YOU looking for excuses to make his affairs ok? Why isn't he looking to the root of his acting out in painful unacceptable ways so that he can address them?

You coming up with reasons and excuses for his bad behavior only allows him to continue in it. Why not focus on why you are trying to make this behavior ok for yourself and work on you

i would have to agree with inis! does it matter why? it should only matter that he does and that he needs to stop it or just to go.

I also agree with Inis.. Using excuses of depression to cheat is never a good sign.. Are you going to stay with a man that cheats?

I never thought of that but in my current situation, I would ahve to really look at that closely... endorphines are our internal "Happy Juice" and sex really kicks in the endorphines... and SEX is always more exciting when it is on the edge/ forbidden or new.

Yeah I think there maybe something to that

i don't feel like i'm making excuses for what my husband did. Just trying to make sense of it all. He can never see the bouts of depression coming on, and won't go to the doctor. He tells how worthless he is and what a bad person. I believe he's sick. We're going to separate. I hope he gets happy.

I'm sorry you're going through that. You sound like a very compassionate person to try understand what might have been happening with him. Hope it works out the best way possible for you!

no.

people cheat because they want to cheat.

no forgiveness.