Depression Support Group

Excerpts from: The Joy of Depression by Kalssyfide
11/13/1999

1. Frowns and forlorn looks use less muscles therefore requiring less strain than a smile and conserve strength for other activities, like head bashing and wailing.
2. Being depressed is great fun for lazy people because you get to stay in bed all day, not shave or shower, dress or brush your teeth or your hair.
3. Being really depressed gives one a great appreciation for the little things in life
-- like tissues.
4. If you can't find your tissues, remember that tears are fun for cats to lick off.
5. If you don’t have a cat you can help the environment by saving your tears to help alleviate water shortages.
6. Being depressed can save you money on going out and having fun, and the accompanying necessity of having to buy and/or wash clothes to go out.
7. Being depressed gets you to meet some very interesting doctors, psychiatrist, psychologists, therapists and counselors you may otherwise have never met.
8. Being deeply depressed allows you to chat with the fun people at the suicide hot-line -- not a 900 number, so no bills!
9. Sometimes you can get so depressed you can have a vacation at your health insurance expense at one of the lovely health care facilities in your locale.
10. Being depressed sometimes allows one to exercise his or her sick sense of humor and write silly things like this or even to become a famous comedian like Chris Farley -- until he died of sheer joy, that is.
11. Depression or being maudlin inspires great poetry and blues songs.
12. Without depression as a comparison, how would anyone know what happiness was or if they were happy or sad?
13. Depressed people are relied upon, not just but the psychologists and psychologists who treat them, but they single-handedly keep the pharmaceutical business thriving.
14. And, best of all you get to give yourself pity parties - and if no one shows up, there’s even more to be self-pitying about – a win-win situation.

Spread the joy – be depressed!

Other books in this series:

"The Joy of Sleep Deprivation"
"The Joy of Not Cooking Because You're not Eating"
and the best seller: “The Fun of Hating Your Job, Your Spouse, Your Life”
Posted on 01/11/09, 03:01 pm