Depression Support Group

I have been on a HUGE roller coaster since I found out about my wife's affair, which has caused PTSD to surface from a lot of childhood abuse. Some days I am deeply depressed and suicidal. Some days I feel (sort of) almost like my old self. I have found that the level of depression varies with the amount of sleep I get, my health, other stressors, how I was feeling before bed, whether I suffered from nightmares that night, etc. I feel the impact of depression every day, but it certainly isn't equal.

If you are being treated with medication, I have found that I react very differently to different meds (trying to find the right one still). Celexa was OK, but caused a lot of sleep deprivation. Paxil was ok, but I tended to have more suicidal thoughts (along with crappy side effects). Luvox seems the worst of all in controlling depression (seems to numb the good emotions while failing to controll the bad ones) so far, but some of the side effects are better. If you are being treated with meds, definitely talk to someone experienced with psychotropic drugs (not the family Dr.) and discuss things. They very well may want to try something new, or add something like Welbutrin.

On the bad days, I try very hard to tell myself that a good day might be just a few hours away, and try to take things minute by minute. The fact is though, on those really bad days, nothing I seem to do makes me feel better. For that, I created a backup plan, and made sure I someone I could count on was with me and (just in case) knew how to reach help if I got really bad.

hi...i really do think depression varies from day to day and week to week.
i'm sorry that you're having such a crappy time with it right now, but when i'm at an extreme, i try to keep in mind that sometimes even one day of proper, healthy food and one good night's sleep (along with my meds and therapy) can really give me a more positive perspective.

yes