Depression Support Group

Well, Kaca, let's start with this. Your boyfriend CAN'T make you happy. And it's not his job to. The only person who can make you happy (at least on a long term/permanent basis) is you. I know that sucks 'cause it's something I struggle with everyday.

Congratulations. Congratulations on having found someone to be with. That's a wonderful thing and possibly more rare than you might think. At least it has been in my experience.

Congratulations on being able to recognize your symptoms before they completely take over.

Congratulations on finding this website and being brave enough to join us and talk about your situation.

My advise to you would be two fold. First sit down with your boyfriend and explain everything the best way you can. If you don't fully understand the chemistry of depression, do the research so that you can explain the scientific realities to him regarding the chemical imbalance and how it has little or nothing to do with your environment or his actions. Tell him that this isn't the first time you've been through this. Tell him you love him, and keep telling him every chance you get. I believe one of the thihngs that will help you come out of this will be NOT being alone. Tell him that you're going to do the following in order to correct the problem.

Second, see a doctor post haste. If medication has worked for you in the past. Do it again. If you get things under control while you're still in the early stages of this, I have to think coming out of it will be easier and faster for you.

Whatever you do, realize that the most important thing is you've got to take care of yourself first. IF you explain all this to him and he can't stick it out then you're better off without him but if he is as wonderful as you say, I believe he will understand and see you through it.

Good luck.

Explaining how depression feels and convincing love ones of the severity of this condition is really hard. Until recently I thought it was impossible.
Go to your nearest library or book store and look for a book called the Noonday Demon, by Andrew Solomon. The first 20 pages perfectly describe the different levels of depression. It also is the only book that I have found that gives a perfect description of the disease that can really be understood by love ones.

Another way that works to a certain degree is explaining the fear factor. Have the love one close there eyes and think of there biggest fear. Make sure they have felt that anguish and fearful situation for a few seconds. Have them open their eyes and ask them how did they feel during the first few seconds of facing their greatest fear. Tell them Depression feels like that.

Well, I am in the same boat. My husband is the most happiest go lucky person god made. He has never been depressed or sad a day in his life. He will never udnerstand my pain. He just won't. I have talked to him for hours and hours, days and days, years and yeas. And he will never understand because he has never deen in my place before. I even took him to a therpay sesson and let the doctor tell him why I have the syptoms I do and how it affects my everyday life. Went in one ear and out the other. He is a great husband, dont get me wrong. He really tries to understand, he just cant grasp the concept.

Thanks for everyones advice...If anyone has any idea of where I can find info, or articles that could explain this.....I would be very grateful! I think that was a great idea to print articles that explain it in ways that would make it easy for him to understand.