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Hi Everyone - Has or is anyone dealing with a loved one with vascular dementia? My mom has been in the very early stages of being diagnosed (the pace of the medical system is driving me nuts). Well, the other day she was admitted to the hospital due to a gall bladder attack, which was removed. Well, her reaction to the anesthesia was shocking - almost like it flipped some switch that caused a nervous breakdown/angry/delusional/had-to-be-restrained. The doctors assured me it was not uncommon and she would forget everything the next day. Well, she didn't. As a result she has decided she hates me, doesn't trust me, I am a liar etc etc. Now, we brought her into our home 6 months ago with the hope her small place (500 miles away, down by my sis) will sell at which time we would renovate our 2 car attached garage into a nice apartment for her. Well - it hasn't sold yet and mom has gotten very anxious. Anyway - she now refuses to come back to our home - wants nothing to do with me and said she will "send for her things". All of this totally out of the blue. The hospital called in a psychiatrist and he suspects vascular dementia, started her only last night on the lowest does of Resperidol (sp?) and said she could probably be discharged in a day or 2. Yikes!!!!! She has threatened to kill herself if sent to our house. I am beside myself with worry and concern. She has no money so placement will be hard, if that is the route we choose. She still has many of her faculties - enough to be dangerous. She presents well with medical staff and can really fake stuff. The psychiatrist told me that often dementia or psychosis patients will often turn on the most recent caregiver. Still - I am freaked. Anyone been through something like this?
Posted on 05/30/08, 06:05 am

Hug mrswalls

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Reply #1 - 05/30/08 9:18am

My husband has vascular dementia. It is a lot like Alzheimer's and the stages are much the same.

Go to www.alz.org and find the 24 hour hotline number for the Alzheimer's Society. Call them and ask for advice and help. And yes, you can call in the middle of the night. I did!

Do NOT let them discharge her. She is threatening bodily harm. Talk to the hospital social worker ASAP and have them place her. If she doesn't have any money, she is probably eligable for Medicaid.

DO NOT TAKE HER TO YOUR HOME!

I have not been through this, but dementia patients do not do well if they have anesthesia.

And please take care of YOURSELF.

Reply #2 - 05/30/08 11:06am

Thanks for your reply. I spoke with her Dr this morning and stressed that we do not want her here as it would be a strong safety concern. I am still waiting to hear back from the social worker. The psychiatrist did say that if the GP wanted to discharge her, then the GP should call him,the psychiatrist. first. So, hopefully he has something, some option, to offer. I never suspected this sort of route would happen!! I feel like the wind has been knocked out of me. I know she is not responsible for her thoughts and feelings but it is so hard to separate that in my mind! Thanks again for your reply!!! God Bless.

LacyMary

Reply #3 - 05/30/08 11:59am

My husband had vascular dementia and I went through a very similar situation when he had surgery. His dementia was bad before the anesthesia but he got completely psychotic, delusional and violent following surgery. He got so bad a few weeks after surgery I had to call 911 and have him involuntarily committed to the geriatric psychiatric unit of the local hospital. I was told by his appointed psychiatrist that anesthesia always does some damage to the brain and with their brains already damaged, vascular dementia patients always do badly following surgery.
Hang in there. Unfortunately your in for a very hard time.

Reply #4 - 05/30/08 2:56pm

LacyMary thank you for telling us what you told us. I knew that I'd read that about anesthesia but I wasn't sure where since it was pretty early in my attempts to learn something about this disease.

I know there are some differences between Alzheimer's and Vascular Dementia and now I'm paying attention to the differences.

There is also the possibility that my husband has both diseases.

Reply #5 - 05/31/08 1:12pm

LAcyMary - Very interesting point you made. Thank you. It is comforting to know this may not be as uncommon as I thought. I have been advised to start the process to petition as her legal guardian (GULP!!). She is still functioning enough to understand that and it will certainly throw her in even more of a state, I am afraid. I hate this!! I will stay in touch as your support and that of ImAStar will be very helpful. Thank you!

Reply #6 - 06/01/08 10:38am

Welcome to hating this. We all HATE this. It tears families apart. It tears marriages apart. It tears the caregiver apart.

michcala

Reply #7 - 06/02/08 2:28pm

mu mum was diagnosed in january with vasc dementia. It was an absolutely horrific nighmare which i will never forget. totally delusional psychotic and suspicious and hateful of my father although this turned on all of us. she was sectioned for 3 an half months till the meds could be tolerated by her without any violence or aggressive episodes. she now on haloperidol carbomazapine and tomazopam sleeping tablet she is aat home with 24 hour carer almost totally funded by state as was deemed dangerous and a threat meds made big difference although you can see her suspicions come back and still getrs agitated. my thoughts are with you because unless you have seen all this with your own eyes it is unbelievable. pls look after yourself hope it helps to hear you not on your own. O ther people dont have a clue. love and good wishes xxx karin xxx

Reply #8 - 06/02/08 9:04pm

Thanks, Karin, for sharing your story and your support. It is pretty horrible. I just came back from the hospital and since Mom is still too well functioning for nursing home consideration and does not have funds for assisted living, she falls in what the doctor calls the "grey area". So,,,guess where she is being discharged to tomorrow? Yup - back to our home again. We don't have the funds to employ in-hme care and I made the doc well aware that our family must go on - work, school, etc - so even though he and we have safety concerns, not to mention just the emotional drain of having her here, this is her only option. DOn't get me wrong - we are glad to have her however we do beleive her needs now exceed what she can get from us here. But there is no where else for her to go. So I suspect it will be days of her depressions, paranoia, accusations etc etc and we will just have to do our best to ride 'em through until she advances further and can be placed somewhere.

Reply #9 - 06/03/08 12:26pm

mrswalls, how old is your mother? Have you contacted your local Agency on Aging. EVERY state has one if you are in the US. There are similar agencies in Canada and the UK.

Have you looked into day care? What did the hospital social worker say?

Have you called the Alzheimer's Association? What did they say?

By the way, if she gets violent, the Alzheimer's Association told me that you dial 911 and tell them you need someone to take her to the hospital.