Dementia Support Group

I've faced this problem as well. One of the things that you will soon notice is that dementia affects short term memory too. She will not likely even remember it happened.

yes, I have had that happen and it was partly me losing my oatience which made him madder. The only thing that really worked was me sitting quietly or lying down quietly, not continuing the anger, just quietly saying, ok dear, yes dear until he sat down and then the memory of it was gone. As has been stated here before, many different ways- don't argue with them, it doesn't do any good no matter how right you are and wrong they are. You are the only one in control.

I think just removing yourself from their presence also helps. It send the message that you won't tolerate abuse.

Thank for the advice - I'll certainly act on it next time anything happens. A matter of half an hour later it was as if nothing had happened. Later in the evening Mum seemed to be having very vague memories of the incident. Something was bothering her but she couldn't quite put her finger on it. This in turn was bothering her more. Having slept on it though, she's been fine today (Tuesday). Thanks for all the support - I appreciate it.

I have dealt with this many times... and everytime it broke my heart. It probably will happen again but just like this time she will forget. I had to keep telling myself that this was not my Mom. It will take more of a toll on you than it does her. So remember we're here for you.

I'm so sorry about your mom. She won't remember her nasty behavior. Please, try to remember that she doesn't know what she is doing or saying. I speak from experience.

My mom died on February 22, 2009. She was 89 years old, and in the end stages of Alzheimer's. My son & I took care of her right up until the day she died. It was not easy, and with knowing what we endured for the last 10 years & 2 months of her life, I wish with all my heart that she was still with us.

I hope this helps you in some way. Please, remember to love and appreciate your mom while you still have her. The last memory I have of my mom is watching her being taken away in a body bag.

Keeping you in my heart, thoughts & prayers.

God Bless.

Somuch

When this happens, just let it pass. As much as you want to argue, resist and deflect it. The more you argue the more she'll remember that issue. If you leave it for a while, there is a chance she'll forget about it. When things like this happen, i just listen no matter what she says, i just assure her that we'll work something out. It seems like a mean gesture, but it really is best for the both of you. If you are able to deflect it gently during the conversation, it could end right then and there. Humor always helps! Good luck!