Coming Out Support Group

Hey Ashley. I've just come out to my parents - today in fact - and god its like a huge burden has been lifted. I came out to my younger brother first, how is also gay, and he was like - oh I have known for years! (I think he knew before me :) My parents have been so fantastic with him and his partner, so I kind of knew that the rules surely wouldnt change for me. Still it took me all my strength, just came out with it, and with that came years and years of tears - my mum said that it changes nothing, and I told my dad when he came home from work about an hour ago - again, he said that "thats ok, it changes nothing, we still love you just the same" I couldnt ask for better parents - I know I am totally lucky, not everyone is as fortunate with such accepting parents. Good luck hun, sending you strength and braveness - you will feel such relief afterwards, and wonder why you didnt do it sooner. much peace!

I came out to my father and grandmother when I was in high school and they told me I was confused and that it was a sin. Now I am trying to come out to my mother who happens to be really really religious.

I've tried coming out many times. I always end up feeling out of breath and just pace around the house. I am never able to say it to her. I'm afraid that I will hurt my parents. The only person I have ever told is my younger sister. My parents are Catholic, as is the entire extended family. Coming out would not only mean that I would get marginalized, but my parents as well. My cousin came out 4 years ago, and it caused chaos. I am 99% sure that my older brother is gay, but he hasn't come out either. I do not know what to do, and its killing me.

When I finally came out to my mom it was after reading this amazing story by one of my favorite authors. It drove me to tears and broke down my barriers and I knew then that it was now or perhaps never. I stood in the doorway for several minutes building the nerve to call to my mom who was in the other room to come in and talk. I was literally shaking, my whole body started to go numb, and I felt out of breath. I finally croaked out so she could hear that I wanted to talk. When she saw me crying she asked what was wrong and we sat on the bed. After I babbled for a while about how something I thought I knew I was wrong about and being unable to say it, she finally finished it by asking if I was gay. She had suspected for perhaps years. At the time I told her I was bisexual, but no I feel I am gay. It really was a gigantic weight off my shoulders, I felt like a new person. It really will make you feel a lot better to tell her, and even if she isn't as accepting as my mom was, it will still feel good to have it out in the open, and then you can start working through any apprehensions she might have. But again, you may have an awesome mom and your fears were unfounded. Best of luck to you hun you can do it.

Thanks CassieDW. I feel a lot better after reading your comment. I'm just not sure if I can tell her. I'm almost certain she would accept me, because she is amazing. What I fear most is the burden she would have carrying the "shame" that would come from my coming out. Especially, since there is no way my father can know. He is terminally ill and a shock like finding out his son is gay would probably kill him.

When I came out to my family they actually told me they already knew.