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Discussion:
Breavement and Working Co-Dependents Anonymous
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Hello everyone. This is a piece of my story. Over the past three years, I have suffered several losses as I trying to build a family. My first daughter died a death after birth. Ann our second daughter is a beauitful almost 2 years-old child. After her birth, my co-dependency went into full gear.

I come from a very abusive family of orgin. I learned at a young age to people please as a tool to avoid the abuse. My inlaws are very rigid. You do what you are told. We had some type of honeymoon with the family until Ann was six months old. My in-laws and we were honeymooning until Ann was about a year old. The eve before her first birthday, I started Coda.

I am a very grateful member of CODA. Today, I focus on myself and I have redefined my family as Ann and my husband. We remain social with both families. We just don't get emotionally as close. Since we learned this is a self defeating behavior.

This year, I continue to experience loss through a miscarrige (mc) at 6 weeks and recently another mc at 18 weeks of pregnancy. It really has effected my program and working the steps. I was hoping to hear other people's stories about loss and working the program.
Posted on 06/19/07, 03:58 pm
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Reply #1 - 06/25/07  7:01pm
" Ah Dorothy,
I so feel for you. I knew straight away that you was on a program from almost your first sentence here. It oozed surrender and acceptance adn someone who was feeling their feelings unashamably.

Today, I found out that an AA member I cared a great deal for threw himself off a building and killed himself. Hmmmm. How does faith and trust come in when stuff like this and death in general happens. I'm not through processing my feelings on this at present but just know that there is perfection in the spiritual design and that there are no mistakes in God's Universe - that everything can be used for greater insight into ourselves and our recovery.

Keeping the Faith Dorothy. Hoping you are too.
Big Hug,
Tusti XX "

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