Children Of Divorced Parents Support Group

Up until i was 18, i had a good life. My parents worked hard but at the end of the day they would cook dinner together and laugh and joke and have fun. I always envied them and swore i would find a relationship like theirs someday. They were so happy. That was, until the first year of my freshman year in college. My dad told my mom he was leaving her for another woman. Now, this other woman was uneducated, unemployed and much much heavier than my beautiful mother. All of our friends and family were shocked. My mom went to therapy and she told everyone that I was her "rock" because I was there for her every step of the way. My older brother was saddened but for the most part he showed no emotion. My mom and I moved out and she began dating again after much time of sobbing. Now, 2 and a half years later, she is engaged to a good guy. My father decided to move across the country and marry the homewrecker that tore apart my life. He only calls or texts on holidays. Before the divorce, I was daddy's little girl. He was pretty much my best friend. We went to concerts together, talked about religion and current events often. Once he was with this other woman he suddenly converted from atheist to christian and everything about him changed. He became a stranger. I went through deep depression and attempted overdosing more times than I will ever admit. He has no idea because he stopped being a part of my life. I never thought it would hurt this bad. He told my mom that because my brother and I were over 18, that we weren't kids and we could handle this better than if we were younger. He was wrong. I'm still struggling every day. I even went to a city with friends in the same state (across the country) that he lives in. He didn't have time to meet up with me. If he doesn't want to see me after I travel 2500 miles to his state, then why would he want to see me ever? I have come to terms that I won't have him to walk me down the aisle or dance with me at my wedding. My future kids wont know their true grandpa and my future husband will never meet his wife's father. I always dreamed of these things happening. Some days I feel I will never get over this. And when I think of him dying, it hurts even more. I know he will die and I wont know what to do because by then I probably will have given up and stopped trying all together. I just want my family back. I want to be happy. I dont know what to do.
Posted on 06/13/12, 03:06 am