Breast Cancer Support Group

Just having you there will be a big help and comfort to her. When caring for her, think back to how your mum cared for you when you were a child and now it is your turn. It won't be easy, but the effort will be valued. You can't be everything to her, so don't try. Ask her what she wants and how you can best help her. Being strong doesn't mean not showing emotion or being sad. Once she gets through this rough patch, it will be easier. As to the foods. It depends on what she craves. Ice cream helps some, but others are nauseated by dairy. Soup might be a good option, starting with broth. That will help with hydration and electrolytes. She may have specific cravings and now is the time to give in to them. All the best to you and your mum and know that you are doing a wonderful thing.

There is a medication called Salivix which my mum still takes for dry mouth. You can also get sprays to stimulate saliva production. She should mention this to her doctor and request the medication. You can buy it over the counter too.

She found that it helped to eat small amounts often rather than having to face 3 big meals. Even as small as a handful of nuts. She ate a lot of raw food, fruit and veg as smells of cooked food were repugnant to her. She used The Food Doctor's books to help her plan her meals.

There are also ways of helping with digestive problems, again these should be mentioned to her doctor. My mum had terrible problems as her oesophagus was corroded by the chemo drugs and so it was really hard to swallow. She also gets bad acid reflux caused by the chemo. Other side effects were very dry skin (she got medicated bath products and moisturisers on prescription for that) and neuropathy (apparently caused by the residue of chemo drugs in extremities reacting with sunlight and helped by application of dark nail polish).

It is important to mention side effects to a doctor as soon as they appear and keep mentioning them until something is done. It helps to keep a journal of meds, appointments and side effects so if there is a reaction to a drug it can be traced back and the drug can be changed.

Also, it is important to keep your mum occupied and try to prevent depression. My mum went back to knitting and embroidery, and puzzles, sudoku and crosswords. We bought her an MP3 player and she signed up to an online service where for a monthly fee she couled download audiobooks. This really helped as she loves to read but at some stages was too weak to lift a book.

There are also other things available to cancer patients and carers. My mum really benefitted from a class in makeup during chemo, she never really wore any prior to the chemo but it devastated her skin so much she felt she needed it. She got herself a nice wig so people did not notice the hair loss.

That's all I can think of right now but if you have any other questions or need to vent just PM me.

My mother was diagnosed with stage 3 Breast Cancer in December of 2010. She went through a mastectomy, chemotherapy, and radiation. She is currently on Tamoxifin. I have been in the same situation as to how do I stay strong for her and myself at the same time.
I have dealt with it by when I am talking with her I try to focus on her thougths and feelings. Doing this by giving a lot of encouragement and doing a lot of listening. Then when we are able to visit her I try to keep her busy and discuss the situation with her only when she wants to talk about it. My mom is a very caring person and through all this has tried to help others with their drama filled life which takes her mind of her problems.
As for myself dealing with the situation I have found that finding those couple close friends to be able to confide in really helped me. I found that this is a subject that if a person has not been through it is really hard for them to help support you. However those who do take the time to listen have made more of an impact on me then those who think they are helping. Sometimes like with your mom, all we need is to have someone listen without saying a word.
She to was very sick the first session of chemotherapy she had. Her oncologist gave her a medication called Emend. She had to take it the day before, the day of, and the day after her chemotherapy treatment and she did not get sick. Which helped her from not getting dehydrated. She would have about a week of low appitie. She did have to make herself eat, even if it was a few bites of food.
I will keep you and your mother in my prayers.

hi,i just came across this group and i had to join it...i am really sorry for what you are going through..i am in the same boat myself..my mum is 53.she was diagnosed with breast cancer about two weeks ago..i only found out this week..she has already undergone a left mastectomy..we are to go for the doctors appointment in a few days to get started on the rest of the treatment..its scary as hell..i find myself crying all the time(in privacy)..i feel sad and scared but i just pray that God gives us strength to support her through all this.i am trying very hard to be normal but this cloud is just hanging over our heads..But i believe it will get better with time and that the sun will shine again..I thank God for just stumbling upon this blog.
Just be there for your mum.she needs you now more than ever..it is hard but try be strong for her.Also share this with a few close friends and try get as much information as possible(on diet,treatment etc)...hope all goes well for you and your mum..