What is Breakups Divorce
Divorce or dissolution of marriage is the ending of a marriage before the death of either spouse. The main causes of divorce in 2004, according to a recent study, were extra-marita...
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Selfish Venting!!!!
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So i'm up this morning just listening to my son run around playfully yelling "mommy" "daddy" alternating between the two. I feel so selfish because i do not want any contact with his dad AT ALL which includes arranging for time with the baby... I don't feel like offering him any conveniences because he's the one that left us emotionally...Why should I owe him favor? Every bit of me wants to write him off as dead...It's SELFISH as hell, but in my mind it just seems easier to explain that "daddy isnt around because he's dead vs Daddy isn't around because of choice (meaning he's too coward to work on a relationship and believes that as long as he takes care of his son financially he's being a dad) I know i sound bitter.. because i am... but I so do not want to deal with the BS of a "check daddy" child support hell or anything of the sort...I'd rather say he's dead and raise my kids alone. This situation is exactly why it took me 17 years to have another child.... now look where i am....
I'm looking forward to hear what my therapist has to say... arghhhhhhhhhh!!! i hate this... i really do. Posted on 11/07/09, 11:11 am |
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(((HUGS))), it's OK, vent away, so many here understand how you are feeling. I hate that you're having to go through this, I'm glad you are going to a therapist to help guide you through this difficult time. 
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of course you are bitter, here is a child who really could use a father and his father just wants to write a check to feel ok about his lack of being there for his child. I am sure you tried to set visitation so he can have time, yes? and he chooses not to?
if so, all you can do is think of a reason, mature reason, as to why he is not there so that when your child is serious about asking why, you have something you can say without fumbling or just saying, "cus he is a non-caring person"... or that he is dead... stay strong and continue to vent here so you can have that all out when it comes time to really tell your kid where their dad really is.
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great points CTB...it's just right now it's too difficult to deal with him at all..Thanks for the much needed hugs Duva... i'm trying to keep my head up...
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oh girl...I completely understand this one...I have been financially fine since my H left....but he rarely sees our girls and I don't know how you explain that he just doesn't give a shit - without it sounding like "he just doesn't give a shit"....ugh
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I'm glad you came to the boards *wink*.
Vent away
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This is a totally safe place to vent and the way you are feeling is really understandable. I can't stand "checkbook dads". I'm glad we have so many examples of real male parents on DS.
Lynne
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