What is Breakups Divorce
Divorce or dissolution of marriage is the ending of a marriage before the death of either spouse. The main causes of divorce in 2004, according to a recent study, were extra-marita...
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remorse ~~ forgiveness ~~ time
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I'm still at work at 8pm and have CBCRadio! on to keep me company. I just listened to an interview between the daughter of a British MP , and the person responsible for the IRA bombing that killed her father.
It was a remarkable discussion to listen to between 2 people who have met 60 times, learning about compassion, remorse, and forgiveness. I wonder if I'll ever be able to come to that level of forgiveness for what my exS did to me. The human spirit can be so remarkable. I dont know that I have the capacity to reach for that level of spirit. http://www.cbc.ca/thecurrent/2009/... Posted on 11/06/09, 08:11 pm |
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I talked to my clergy about forgiving my husband for what I went through. It really helped me see that instead of hating him, that he came from a really bad family and has issues. Instead now I can pity what he went through, and what he did, and what the outcome is. 
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Then don't forgive him...
It's easy. Now move on...
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I know that I will never forgive mine. Not even close. He hurt me to the core of me and that is not repairable not by a long shot. If you can you are a bigger person than I am. I am in awe of anyone that can.
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I forgive her, but I don't forgive what she has done to me and the children.... that is inexcusable for me.
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MaxiDale,
then what is it you forgive her for? I have forgiven my exS (I think) for BEING the way he is, he cant help it, for the lying, the using, the confusing, the abusing...but there is this one thing so BIG I just cant, in fct if I allow myself to think about it, I get rageful all over again. Rman, thankfully I dont worry about it too often, as I said I go into a form of dissociation or denial by not etting myself think of this one thing, but then innocuous things pop up like this really quite remarkable interview, and I leap back to that headspace.
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I forgave mine.
She showed remorse and apologized after it happened, shortly after it happened in the grand scheme of things when I see what some people on here went threw for years. We are good friends still and this is going on 2 years
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I can't forgive mine. She did it too many times and shows no remorse for it. She continues to be manipulative and care only about her own needs.
Besides, forgiving her is still about #99 on my list of shit to do.
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You can forgive without the offender's apology, remorse or acknowledgement. Forgiveness only requires one person.
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I don't forgive, I just have moved on.
If I give it a thought or moment, it is a waste of my life. He is somehow comforted by this, he knows it is in the deep file cabinet of my soul, but as long as I don't dwell on it - I can heal. He's apologized, but it just doesn't fill the hole that is where my heart use to be.
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