Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Was it due to the guilt maybe? From the cheating? I was trying really hard to make things work between us and he had all kinds of issues going on that I was clueless about!

Oh, don't think it had ANYTHING to do with you! Please, sweetie. But it did have everything to do with HIM. Alright, guys, can you jump in and tell her it wasn't her?

some guys, and even girls, use viagra for recreational reasons. it only takes a tiny bit though if you don't have a reason to take it. so, for all of you guys reading this post, only take 1/4 of a pill! it has the same effect on women too.

Not the female, never ever. It is the man. Contrary-wise, if he no longer feels the attraction then it is time for a grown-up discussion. My theory? He believes the advertizing, imagining an inadequacy that he doesn't have.

Maybe he wasn't even using them with you! If he was cheating, maybe he was feeling so guilty with "her" that he had to use them then! Just a thought!
Hugs to you my dear friend! I know this is hard for you!
How are "our" babies?

It was odd to me that he would take them and hide it from me. I don't know for certain if there was "physical" cheating but definitely the emotional cheating was going on and while he denies it, my gut tells me there was the physical too. He had cheated in the past also and I didn't find out about both situations until just a couple of weeks ago when I walked out. So it was either guilt, recreation, with her.... or a combination of all 3... I don't know why but for some reason it has stuck in my mind and I've been curious abou it. Lots of random pieces of info start to gradually fit together. And of course some pieces never will fit...

I know he used it with me. One time he just kept going and going and I got tired of it and asked him if he had taken a viagra - I was mostly joking and he said YES. He used to seem like a "normal" guy but over about the last 2-3 months of our relationship, he got really weird. Either that or I just finally started seeing what I wasn't seeing before??

It could mean that he is engaging in extracurricular activities and wants to appear 'manly'.

Bingo, Thriver. that's what it sounds like to me. Sort of part of a midlife crisis, wishing he was as young as before you got married kind of thing. It's totally something my ex would do (though not with ME, he had ED problems and never did anything about it--it was my fault because I was fat and unattractive).

A lot of men think that taking the stuff will make them "bigger" or they take it just because it's "cool" I guess.