Breakups & Divorce Support Group

You know your relationship better than any of us. From a strictly you and he perspective, is he doing the right thing? I mean, did you see this coming?

Well, perhaps a little more info is needed. We got married very young and very fast. We have had nothing but a rocky marriage and this was mostly due to me. I was not a nice person. About 4 years ago her left me. I started changing who I was not only for him but because I didn't like who I was. He ended up coming back. I have never really felt that I could trust him. He lies about really insignificant things and some larger more significant things as well. I thought everything had been fine but he told me last week he was trying to believe it was fine and that it really wasn't. At first I was sad and then I started to get mad and vindictive which isn't going to help the situation or me. I don't know if her is doing the right thing. I don't think we should be together. We don't have anything in common and we are complete opposites. A divorce is honestly past due. I just feel so mad, angry, hurt, and mostly bitter. This is not going to help the situation. I just am not sure how to reign it in.

Counseling. There are sliding scale/no-cost counselors available if needed - just google them.

Exercise. I jog/walk. It helps.

Allow yourself to feel what you need to feel. Keeping it in does nothing but allow it to resurface in another way until you process it. You are having normal feelings to a difficult situation. Thats why therapy and exercise help.

xoxo

Are you mad because you don't have control of the situation? That you are now waiting for his actions versus him waiting on yours?

Sounds like the not nice person is coming back in full force. Maybe you tweaked your personality a little too far, and you are going back to a place that is more comfortable for you?

I think I am mad because he is choosing to leave and not try to work on the marriage and not because I don't have "control". I feel like if we both tried to have a better marriage that we would. He is just choosing to walk away after all this time.
And yes perhaps my "not so nice person" is showing her ugly head, point taken.

Oh and I forgot to mention that Saturday I found out he was cheating on me.

Exercise is a great idea. I will try that. As far as counseling goes, I have an appointment with my pastor today to get some information on someone to see. Thanks for the advice.

It's okay to feel the way you feel & to vent your anger if for no other reason than to free yourself.

However, based on what you've told us in your posts, this sounds like this is for the best. It seems that you two were toxic together & should call it quits before it gets far worse. Try to chock it up as a life lesson learned and move on. Staying in this angry place will do more harm than good.

Hope things get much better for you. Remember, you always have friends here that can talk you down when you need it.

It's okay to feel the way you feel & to vent your anger if for no other reason than to free yourself.

However, based on what you've told us in your posts, this sounds like this is for the best. It seems that you two were toxic together & should call it quits before it gets far worse. Try to chock it up as a life lesson learned and move on. Staying in this angry place will do more harm than good.

Hope things get much better for you. Remember, you always have friends here that can talk you down when you need it.

It's okay to feel the way you feel & to vent your anger if for no other reason than to free yourself.

However, based on what you've told us in your posts, this sounds like this is for the best. It seems that you two were toxic together & should call it quits before it gets far worse. Try to chock it up as a life lesson learned and move on. Staying in this angry place will do more harm than good.

Hope things get much better for you. Remember, you always have friends here that can talk you down when you need it.