Breakups & Divorce Support Group

I think in the end, I could probably say the same things about my exS.

Joe if that is all she is good for then its time to move on and find someone else that can fill the LIST of what you really want in life from a partner.

How about you make that list of what you want and then compair to what you have or have received.

best of luck.

You married to this woman?

Oh that just sounds sad. Why is it so complicated? I could ask myself the same thing. Relationships are work for both people, maybe she is not putting any effort into this relationship. If you are asking all of these questions there is good reason to seek counseling or get out of the relationship and move on even if your single because sex is not everything. I do know what you mean because I think maybe I was caught up in the same type of relationship where that was the only thing that was good, the rest was sour!! Good luck with your decision!

Maybe the list should not be about her. How about making a list of character traits you expect from a partner? Not a checklist of what you wish she were, but what you need. Compatable sex would be one of course, but what else do you need long term? Compassion? For her to be health conscience? Commitment, or lack of? ........

If people don't have much on the list other than sex, why DO we have them in our lives?

Maybe you are not filling her needs, have you thought of that? There are many people who do things for their partner and think they are showing love for them by doing them, but instead those things do not come across as love. There is a great book (don't worry it's short) titled The five love languages. It tells how different people perceive love. For some people words of affirmation mean love so they go around telling people how great they are doing or lift them up by words. Others it is acts of service. Doing those little things for others like bringing them their coffee just how they like, or taking their car and getting it filled up and washed. Those are wonderful things, but if your partner's love language isn't acts of service they won't necessarily receive it in which the spirit it is given. But if I knew my partners love language was acts of service then I would really let him know how much I appreciated it. Maybe if you could find out what her love language is and start doing those things your relationship might improve.

BTW, isn't her contribution to your well being and happiness AND financial contribution two more "items?"

Good luck