Brain Injury Support Group

Yup, I still deal with it, (you know it Harvey! It pisses me off).
My mantra is "It is what it is". I can't change the way the think. I won't give up trying to explain it though.

My new tenique is to put it in an analogy. I'm getting good results with that. I can't taste, my family always forgets this~that hurts, cause I live with it.

Sooooo, the last time when I was visiting my sister and she was talking about going to this great local restaurant, with fabulous, garlicky, mozzarella sticks, I got aggravated and (started to drool).

Soooo, I said this "Liz, you love art, your walls are filled with black and white photos, that reveal depth, and French impressionism paintings. Lets say you go blind tomorrow. How about I buy you two Monets' and let you sit and touch the canvas. How would that make you feel? How about your whole family forgets your blind (OK, that's a little far-fetched) and keep giving you paitings and talk about the beautiful rainbows outside.

Sorry, it sounds cruel, but it got my point across. I loved to taste food, now I can't. She loves to look at art, now she couldn't (hypothetically). An analogy I have done this four other times.

Another using an analogy comparing me searching for a word when I'm in the middle of a sentence, ~ when I'm trying to talk about something. I lose my train of thought. I compared it to someone cooking a very elaborate meal, being half way though it, looking for a certain spice in the spice rack and not finding it when you know you definately have it. Very frustrating.

I'm at my wits end with trying to explain it too. The only way to stay sane and keep the love for my family is this way for now until a better way comes along. I'm anxious to read what others have to say. kim.

Besides, I'm running out of room to hide the bodies.

(I'm Kidding !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

My dad, who was and to a certain extent still is insensitive to people, always tells me either I look likr crap or like an old man. This is especially noticeable when I have my pain attack. I change in a moments notice. Slowly I am learning that the " changes" mirror cluster headache symptoms. If this is true, it has been slowly growing since the accident. The thing is I don't usually hang around when the symptoms start and I just keep explaining medical issues. They say to switch doctors, but I am happy where I am at. That I feel is very important.

I use to explain the pain as if you were to hit you finger with a hammer. Then move to the next and keep on doing it untill it stopped. It still didn't make any sense as to why I had "headaches" everyday. So I gave up explaining. When my dad learned I was taking 23 pills a day, he said I was crazy. I told him the pain was much worse before.

While I am not the one with the TBI, I now understand more about my son from reading you all's posts.

Brat, those are interesting analogies and so true about many of the thing he goes through.

He is getting better at communicating and loves to draw. Many times I'll ask him to draw IT when has absolutely cannot find the answer (or question) in his head.

Luckily he does not get headaches often.

Keep trying! My son could not explain as he was 6 when his TBI happened but you can.

none of my family understands my husbands injury either.they want to say that hes just looking for sympathy of something.and they dont like how i play around with him just to get him in a better mood sometimes.but i have to do something to lift his spirits because he gets so down about somethings he used to do that he cant do anymore.

Bless you melissa for doing that. I once read a Sunday newspaper Parade magazine article about a woman whose husband had a TBI and she stated how important it was for her to protect her husbands self-respect, self-esteem - always remembering who he was before the injury. She didn't want him to suffer the loss of the very important aspects of SELF. I really loved reading about her. :)

If I talk about it people treat me like i'm looking for sympathy, but that's totally wrong. Sympathy alone does nothing. I have no reason to seek sympathy becuase it's useless as a goal of it's own. I'm seekign their real world understanding becuase some of the issues really require a bit of understanding to allow the tbi sufferer to deal with the changes it causes in day-to-day life better than they can otherwise.

I guess it is just another " thing " to deal with along with each of our own issues that were left from the TBI. I call them reminders. I just wish I could get out of this depressed state I am in. I know it doesn't help much. My family tries to a certain extent to understand, but they don't fully understand.

I will just sit back and wait for life.