What is Brain Injury
Traumatic brain injury (TBI), traumatic injuries to the brain, also called intracranial injury, or simply head injury, occurs when a sudden trauma causes brain damage. TBI can resu...
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Spiritual advice, please !
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Ok, with out boring you to death , let me just start out by saying, because of somethings that went on when I was growing up all I ever felt called to be was a "good" mommy(not that my mommy wasn't good, she did the best she could under her circumstances}, all I ever wanted was children. I had two miscarriages, and was told when I got pregnant with my son that if I didn't carry him I would have to have a hysterectomy........so long story short he was my miracle baby...lots of problems, but he was born. I knew from the beginning God had a specific plan for him, as he grew older in life he developed some addictions, (to the point where I had to turn him away at the door) Then the wreck happened and I was with him all the time, he was still my miracle baby. Way surpassed the flight surgeons expectations by staying alive and all the Doc's ect. Anyway he is still alive and recovering but here is the dilemma......... I personally don't have any anger with God or question, why the things that happened with my son happened (I feel like God had to give him a good hard slap in order to save his life and get him back on track for his mission). But my son does have a lot of confusion and anger about it, (well after all he is TBI :0) ) I am thankful that I can still talk to him, hug him, be with him. But I would ask that prayers continue for his recovery, both physically, mentally, but mostly spiritually. Because at this point he is very angry, and in his mind he doesn't understand the way he used to about Jesus being the ultimate sacrifice for our sins, so what he is thinking and saying right now is, "Look, if I had to choose my son's life (which he does have a young son that he is not allowed to see at this point) or all of us sinful SOB's--- everybody here would be going to hell. Because I would choose for my son to live" I am not sure how to answer that. And this is the little baby boy human I gave birth to , that all his growing up years only wanted to be a Baptist minister. Anyway, I can give advice for a lot of things especially if it is clinical, but I am looking for some advice, spiritually here. I have prayed a lot and still not gotten a clear answer. Maybe it is not my place to know what to say to him at this time, or maybe it is the place for someone here to impart some divine wisdom that God has laid upon your hearts. Sorry for whining about this, but thanks for listening, it helps. So few understand (and don't get me wrong I don't want the addicted son back, I just want any advice for how to help him understand where he is spiritually). Hope this makes sense, worked 1800-0600 yesterday then didn't sleep today, if it doesn't please let me know and I will clarify, thanks. Hugs, Kat
Posted on 09/16/09, 01:09 am |
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Kat,
I dont think there is a clear answer...God seems to answer our prayers in different ways. Sometimes it seems to me the answer he gives isnt the one we want to hear. I know your heart must be broken seeing your baby this way. I dont know what I would do if I were in your shoes. I care for my husband, but I know its totally different when it comes to our children. In my own situation and when I read stories in this website, or when I remember all the people in the rehab hospital I question why, why why... I dont know if we ever will have the answer here in this world. I strongly believe if our lives on earth our hard our eternity in heaven will be even more blessed. Since Joe was hospitalized I've prayed to St. Joseph and just when I feel I cant go on anymore, somehow, somewhere something happens. Whether finacially, emotionally or whichever. Small things that others may not realize but I do. I dont know if you can ever "make" someone else understand or be spiritual. I guess all you can do is keep praying and keep being a wonderful mother. I'll keep you both in my prayers. I dont know if this helped or if I just babbled on. 
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Let me add some personal input to this. I understand his anger at God somewhat I will explain as I go in more detail to the somewhat part.
Anger is part of the recovery for a TBI, he could be angry with everyone, certain people, or God as I have read right here on DS. It is an expected part of the recovery process, some have more than others. I to had beliefs prior to my accident, but...the way I saw it then and still do sometimes is; if the prayers said for me to be okay helped why was I left this way...I mean with the TBI. To look at me you wouldn't know I totalled a motorcycle a year ago, I don't have multiple horrible scars a person would expect to see. I don't have any physical disablities except a limp that comes and goes as it pleases. In fact I have very much to be grateful for it could have been much much worse! Yet, I struggled with my own anger. I don't think I pointed it at God, but I have a strong reason not to. While I was "out of it" I was able to see my parents (both deceased for several years - I always said I would give "anything" to see them again for 5 minutes) and 5 minutes I did get to see them and everyone I love and care about helped me pay the cost of seeing them. God also let me keep the memory of seeing them, although as time goes by details are not as clear as they were. So, basically I can't be angry at him for giving me what i wanted nor with the cost, but that doesn't mean I wasn't angry. I had a very wise person explain it to me. Look at grief. Each step to acceptance is something a TBI survivor can and will go through. I'm sorry this is so long, but I wanted you to understand why I can understand the anger and why...it wasn't pointed directly at God I can't say some of it wasn't. You may be right about how you feel, but I seriously doubt your son will care to hear it. He is struggling to accept it himself...at least I was...still am. God bless you all!
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