What is Bisexuality
Bisexuality is a sexual orientation which refers to the aesthetic, romantic, and/or sexual attraction of individuals to other individuals of both their own and the opposite gender ...
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Total rejection from every standpoint...
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So I'm new to this site and this group...but it would be nice to hear some thoughts and advice from you guys.
Basically...my entire family has rejected me, with the exception of my brother. I recently had to move back in with my parents, and they don't even want to talk to me. The members of my extended family who know have shunned me and spread rumors throughout the family. I tried to befriend people in the gay community thinking that they would be more open, but they accused me of "sitting on the fence," being greedy, and only claiming to be bi for the attention of men. They also called me "barsexual." (All of which isn't true!) My straight female friends avoid me because they assume I'm going to make a move on them, and my straight male friends assume that I want a threesome, so they harass me and make jokes. My current boyfriend knows that I've been with women but denies any indication that would make me a bisexual. He knows...but he pretends not to know, and I just don't say anything. Any time I hang out with a female, he calls me repeatedly because he assumes I'm cheating on him. He's terribly homophobic. So I can't hang out with friends, talk to my parents, or even spend time with my boyfriend without feeling like I'm carrying a morbid secret. I guess I just need advice. Posted on 10/27/09, 01:10 am |
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That really sucks... my ex used to insist I wasn't really bisexual also, he always told me it was "just a phase" and I would grow out of it.
When did you come out to your family? They might just need a little time to adjust to the news. And as for girl friends being freaked out by you, when I came out to my friends I told them I saw them as sisters, and that there was no way I could ever be attracted to them because of that. So that pretty much reassured them. They do still sort of get weirded out sometimes, like when I accidentally touch their hand or something or talk too much about a girl I happen to be attracted to, but for the most part they're okay. But your friends may just need time too. Big news always needs good time to soak in with people. 
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It takes a lot of strengh to stand by who you really are inside. I havent told my family (mom dad brother kids ect) my husband knows and always had and only those that have been part of my life in the way of bi relationships have realy known as well. the way I have handled things is I am monogomous (sp) at this time. And my husband has faith in that. SO I can make friends and he is ok with it. He has to beok with who you are. If you are struggling to decide where you want to be then that would lead to him being insecure. If you know you want to be with him and forsake one side of your self then let him know that. and forsaking that side of you doesnt mean you have to give up your mental fantasies, or stop admireing beautiful women, just means maybe not being super open about it. I personally have keep my bi sexuality a very private matter. I am proud to be able to say I love all people as people adn I could spend my life with the right person and that gender doesnt inhibit it. At this time I have chosen a husband so I stand by that choice. That doesnt mean I dont have thoughts but its kinda like I have a man... if I was straight would I keep looking at other men as possibilities??? not likely. SO being bi my selection is just a whole lot larger.... I have a life partner he just happens to be male. SO I just dont actively seek the female stuff.... not that I dont miss it from time to time (like now).
What ever you do dont look at your ability to love any one of any gender as a morbid secret.... you havwe a large heart ;p thats a good thing. YOu just need to find a way to reassure those you share your heart with that they and they alone have your heart
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