What is Bipolar Disorder
Bipolar disorder (previously known as manic depression) is a diagnostic category describing a class of mood disorders where the person experiences states or episodes of depression ...
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I've Lost my Family!
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Ok, so my grandparents are being totally unreasonable and refuse to let any of my kids spend the night at thier house aside from my middle aged son. I've long suspected the reason is because they are going behind my back and letting his bio father see him against court orders (he's an abuser). My grandparents called me up a few months ago and cursed me out because I put my foot down and said if the other kids can't have a turn, then my other child cannot spend the night either.
Then my grandparents retaliated by calling CPS on me and telling them we put bruises all over my son's body. We never did that! cPS INvestigation cleared me, and my mother came over to my house and told me she was on my side and thinks it's terrible what my grandparents are doing to me and that she was very worried about me. She took my kids to see a movie last weekend (she almost NEVER visits or takes my kids out). She said she wanted to pick up my kids and take them to see fireworks and spend the night to o tochurch the next day. Well, my cousin was talking to my hubby today, and asked if he was going to the cookout. My hubby was like, "What cookout"... It turns out my mother is having a big fourth of july cookout and tried not to let me find out. Now I don't know what to think. I feel like she tricked me so she could get my kids and let my grandparents take my son overnight behind my back. It seems to me that she has really chosen thier side, and is just pretending to love me and be on my side because she doesn't want to not be able to see my kids. My ex has ruined my life. 9 years ago today I married him and it was the worst mistake of my life. I don't know what I was thinking. I was such an idiot and now he has manipulated my entire family against me. I wouldn't be surprised if HE was invited to the cookout!!! They don't care or don't believe he ever abused me and my son. Fuck him, fuck them, and fuck the fourth of july!!!! I've been crying my eyes out. My own mother... Posted on 07/04/09, 02:07 am |
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hi it is terrible to go through a marriage with an abusive man (been there). can you get some professional advice from citizen's advice beaureau or pdoc or anyone in the know who can support you in this and help reach your relatives and explain to them that you are not crazy but that you have an illness that you are dealing with and that it does not make you unfit as a mother.
am so sorry that you have to go through all this. 
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Lilly, you have struggled with so much in your young life......your physical and mental health issues alone seem devastating to me, and yet you continue to fight. You are a very strong and compassionate woman, not to mention your intelligence that speaks volumes of your amazing inner strength and determination.
There are lots of ways to handle things here and it has become evident that compassionate communication with your family isnt working. What does your attorney say about the fact that your husband is breaking a court order and your family is helping him do so? I would think this could be handled legally with ease given the court order. I think just showing up at the BBQ can just cause more pain for you if you do it unannounced. Maybe call your mother and tell her of the information you have. Tell her you dont appreciate her lying to you. Is it slightly possible that these are not her intentions at all with your children? If it is, you do not want to blow it out of proportion without all the information. I worry about you Lilly and I am concerned for your physical and mental well being. There have to be some solutions here that can suit everyone. The simple concept that we teach our children....every action has a reaction and every bad choice has a consequence should apply to your ex, grandparents, mother etc. If they choose to sneak around and allow your ex to see his son, then they should suffer the legal consequences. Call your case worker and call your lawyer and put a stop once and for all to the deceit. You are in my prayers sweetie.....Hugs
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My attorney is already looking at my case because my ex petitioned for visitation to resume and for me to be found in contempt for not letting him see him (ridiculous since court said no contact).
I talk to a counselor?therapist that specializes in legal aid and domestic violence issues< and we talked for an hour this morning> Today is just so hard.... not only because everything that's going on now, but it is the 9th anneversary of our wedding... the biggest mistake fo my life
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Sometimes getting better mean getting away from negative people in our lives. I know it hurts but sometimes staying hurts more.
PS. I wouldn't go over there if you paid me!
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I can only imagine how difficult it must be to feel betrayed by ones family.... for them to take his side over yours is sad... since its obviously not easy to find them given a restaurant meeting, I would pursue other avenues since catching them in a lie and breaking a court order can not happen.... speak to your attorney and ask if there is something you can do to reinforce the court order with your family... do they need a reminder or since they are aiding him in breaking the law is there something like a warning that could be issued.. then if the behavior is found to continue, you could petition the court to have them also be court ordered to have no access... this seems extreme but its time they realize these are your kids and you have every right to know they are safe when they leave your care.... if the court will not give him access, then there is proof enough for their action, its time to reinforce your rights as the parent and make them fear legal action for themselves if this continues.... good luck.... ((hugs)) polar
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