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Blaming everything on bipolar
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My partner says i do this... i dont know whether i do or i dont, i mean, its not something i do intentionally!!!!

He says its mainly if ive misjudged things... although i do think that sometimes (whether im hypo, manic or depressed) my judgement IS affected by it.

For example, if im feeling low, and theres someone hitting on me, im more likely to think theyre being nice to pity me rather than they like me and it needs pointing out to me!

Or if im paranoid i can misjudge someones actions as being sneaky, against me when this may not be the case at all!

I try to explain to my partner im NOT just excusing myself because im "feeling ill" but he really just doesn' get it... or is it me that doesn't get it?? Am i excusing myself?? Do any of you feel this???
Posted on 08/20/08, 04:57 am
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Reply #1 - 08/20/08  5:07am
" I get it. Sometimes I get the impression that anyone who knows I am BP assumes every mood I have is dictated by it.

Why can't I have bad and good days? Yes, sometimes I may be in a bad mood, or say something bitchy... but that's who I am.

I have BP, but I also have a personality. Don't let anyone change that.. "
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Reply #2 - 08/20/08  5:08am
" I think its very easy to feel confused yourself about whether its the bipolar or not. People tell me i use my bipolar as an excuse for my actions and I get stroppy and say no! thats not the case, than later i may think mmm maybe that emotion or reaction was real and not my disorder.

I think when any of us truly know which part of us is the bipolar and which isn't, than we can decide for ourselves what is bipolar behavior and what isn't. And hopefully, the loved ones around us will trust us and believe us, maybe even understand if they try hard enough. "
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Reply #3 - 08/20/08  5:51am
" This disorder can be so complicated sometimes that we dont even know ourselves where some of our reactions come from. The best solution is to try to know yourself the best you can. Over the years, I have found that my therapist has been extremely valuable to me in my quest to know my true self beyond the bipolar disorder. There are many levels of behavior, some of which can be shed. Learned behavior caused by our disorder can be discovered and we can learn new ways to behave in given situations. If you recognize a particular behavior as a product of the disorder than you can learn to identify it when it happens and learn a new way to respond. Much of our self doubt and low self esteem comes from the disorder but also manifests itself from our environement growing up and the fact that others did not understand what we were experiencing. Work closely with your therapist and if you cant afford one, read as much as you can to learn to identify your behaviors and triggers and correct them. Also, stay completely open with your partner about the things you learn. Blessings "
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Reply #4 - 08/20/08  6:58am
" Shelly makes some very logical observations about "knowing your bipolar" It is so very important to put them into action. Try not to be so defencive of our disorder. Live and "beleive" that we can perform at an adequate level of behavior. The secret is to have confidence in "self" and try not to let the "disorder" be a "disorder". "
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Reply #5 - 08/20/08  7:27am
" I use bipolar as an excuse to isolate plu I have blamed some of my past negative actions on thee illness which is wrong. That would mean that BPDO takes away my free will to make my own decisions, I do not believe this is true. It may influence my decisions but ultimately it is my choice. I hope. I too misread people all the time and assume it is because they know I have BPDO "
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Reply #6 - 08/20/08  7:47am
" Bipolar doesn't mean that we are unable to feel what we are really feeling inside. I get that to, mainly from my mother and sister. Even though they haven't been around me for the past nine years, anytime I actually show my distaste for something they assume it is my Bipolar.
Yes, there are times I have taken peoples behavior towards me the wrong way, but it is like someone once told me here...All you can do is do your best, we can't change the past. We are not meant to be perfect, and I agree with #3 and #4...try to know your triggers and don't feel bad everytime you, "myself also" , make a mistake. We are not defined by our Bipolar. "
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Reply #7 - 08/20/08  7:48am
" I went through this same issue, checking myself.
Blaming everything on bi-polar is actually blaming you for being yourself since your brain is manically depressed.
It is like blaming a retarted person for being retarted, no shit, the dude is retarted, he cannot fit into the normal mode of being.
Why do you act bi-polar, well no shit, you are bi-polar, therefore, your actions will show it off to one degree or another.
A bi-polar person cannot hide out among normal people forever, eventually, it will become obvious that the dude does not think the same.
I would swear that this disease should be called manically depressed instead of manic depression. I even believe the mania stems from too much depression, maniac depression mania.
I believe that the body, trying to fight the depression, fights too hard into mania.
(My personnal opinion!!!!)
Blaming your actions on BP is you blaming yourself for being you, or someone else blaming you. BP is you! At least a MASSIVE part of the you or I AM!
You know.....I think therefore I am.
In BP land...I think not right therefore I act not right.
See what I am saying????
Instead of blaming BP just blame yourself, same shit.
But we all have to ease up on ourselves otherwise we will feed the (bads.) "
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Reply #8 - 08/20/08  8:03am
" Exactly deepthinker, all we can do is our best.
We are BP, and in my opinion, we're not that bad of people. "
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Reply #9 - 08/20/08  8:11am
" annie......most or at least many beepers are the most compassionate people there are.
Shit, I cannot even go fishing because I feel bad about hooking into a fish for no real reason.
My wife called that empathy.
I have a high amount of that.
( A little off the topic....sorry!!!) "
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Reply #10 - 08/20/08  8:12am
" Maybe your thinking is faulty ,that depends, How much do you trust the person whos telling you it is.BUT maybe its not and that person is just trying to sway you to see things there way ,it depends how much you trust the other persons judgement. "

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