What is Bipolar Disorder
Bipolar disorder (previously known as manic depression) is a diagnostic category describing a class of mood disorders where the person experiences states or episodes of depression ...
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stay away from me
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i find it easier to keep people away. of course, i get devastating lonliness. crying myself to sleep lonliness. i get no sex. no one there to calm me down after my nightly nightmares.
i think in the end it's better that way. i've never had a successful relationship. i don't trust anybody and i doubt i ever will. i wouldn't want anybody to know the real me. the me that sits and wonders what it would feel like to have a bullet rip thru my head. hell, that would scare away satan. alone is where i am. alone is where i'll be. it's best you stay away from me. Posted on 02/25/08, 04:02 am |
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Well I'm just about down enough to get one of my guns out and find out what that bullet feels like for you, just don't know how I'd tell you afterwards... will have to work that out 
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i'm sorry if i helped bring you down. i hope i didn't.
i sure know that feeling tho. i have my plan. have to wait and see if i use it.
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I've had similar thoughts at various times, including recently.
of course i don't know your exact circumstances..so this is sort of arrogant, but you would be surprised what other people see of you and no, many would not run away if they knew the real you. But you can still take you time telling them if you like. Re trusting others, that's difficult. I've got a thing, like many bipolars about rejection. So the best way to avoid rejection is not to approach. But I guess one day I will again. Maybe I'll think it's worth it. Maybe you will too.
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it would take a very special person to love enough to accept all i am. i'm sure somewhere out there such a man exist but i don't think i'll ever find him.
even if i did i'd just fuck it up.
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Patty you didn't bring me down, just giving me a place to vent it before I do it..
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Patty, I'm sure there are. People fuck up their relationships all the time..but if people love each other then that can overcome the fuck up. I've seen it happen many times.
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i'm just tired of being alone and to scared to be with anybody.
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