Bipolar Disorder Support Group

The way I see it you have two options with your children. It's your home and you can tell them they need to be home at a certain time or you are locking them out OR you can let go by telling yourself you have no control of your children. Not sure if you view them as adults now or not but it still is YOUR house and your rules. Sounds like you need some control over the situation for peace of mind.

Sorry your dog is struggling. I hope he and you feel better soon.

Hi Libby~~

I'm glad you shared this because it describes how I've felt many times since my kids have gone off to college and then returned for summer breaks.

Once they left for school and I had a chance to experience some peace and quiet in our home, it is hard to give that up when they come back with boyfriends and dogs in tow.

The chaos really is troublesome. There is crap everywhere, the laundry piles up, sometimes I feel as if they are treating our home like a cheap hotel.

So .... I sat the girls down and explained my feelings. We worked out a more tolerable solution. I hope you can do that too.

Baby Shelby, that's what it's like - chaos. And it's not really chaos sometimes, it's just I take it like it is. If I don't have quiet and routine for part of my day, I'm a mess. Some days I find it so mentally disrupting that I feel nutty. And I'm used to having things where I leave them, or picked up when I clean - such is my life spent mostly on my own having a husband who travels. When weekends come and it's everyone here and crazy, there are just times I want to scream and shut down all operations.

Absolutely Sword Dancer, if I felt the kids were abusing curfews or asking to do unreasonable things, I would sit them down and remind them of the house rules. This isn't the case. I'm just reacting to it like it is.

I miss them so much when they aren't here, but a part of me has learned to let go when they are out on their own. When they're under my roof, they are a constant joy but sometimes a constant worry. Like I said, I haven't been reacting to things well.

Just because I want to build a big nest and curl up in it for a few days, doesn't mean I should be upset that nobody else does. But that's how I feel - like that would make me feel better without reaching for something to calm my nerves. I don't like having to take a pill every time I have these crazy trains of thought.

It sounds like a combo of maybe some OCD and control??.. Either of these can produce a lot of anxiety or even panic...

I agree that there needs to be some house rules for sure and it is your house... at the same time at least the 20 year old is an adult..
Perhaps if you think things are out of control in your home a family meeting when your husband comes home might be in order.. You've raised your children and given them life tools unless you think they are out of control, letting go and trusting that they have some good judgement (unless you think they don;t) would be a gift to all of you... If you don't think your feelings are reasonable therapy could help you with this..
Do you think you're hypo?...
I'm so sorry your dog is ill sweetie.. I hope he's feeling better soon.. I know what distress it can be when our wee furry friends are ill..
Big hug of comfort for you..x