What is Bipolar Disorder
Bipolar disorder (previously known as manic depression) is a diagnostic category describing a class of mood disorders where the person experiences states or episodes of depression ...
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Abortion. . .
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How do people with mental disorders like Bipolar II handle things like abortion? I am recently diagnosed with Bipolar II and before the recent diagnosis I became pregnant. The guy I have been with for 4 years still currently am with him but at the time we had been together for like almost 2 yrs.
Anyway, I told him right away that I was pregnant he was in disbelief, so over the next week I took three more pregnancy tests, ALL POSITIVE. Him, His Mother and many other important people in my life were all pushing the subject of abortion, though my heart was telling me not to listen. I have always been a pro-choicer, I just have the opinio that it is up to each woman herself right? - And so I decide I do not want to do it in my own life. I held fast to my belief system and my faith until everyone broke me down and I finally just had the abortion becuase they tired me out so horribly, I was emotionally broken. Still not fixed. . . I love my boyfriend with all of my heart. . . I have tried to forgive him for acting the way he did and I think I have, but I am still so hurt and scared even a couple years after the abortion. Even though I forgave him, the hurt is still there of the things that were said, I was put in position where I had to choose between my boyfriend and our baby. . . How do I get past this and be able to live my life again? ever since the abortion, I have stop hanging out with friends, haven't gone out of state to visit family, have just been staying at home and spending time with my boyfriend every weekend. It is a pretty isolated life, is why I am here I suppose. I recently like in past two weeks have made two female friends which is out of the ordinary for me I don't usually have ever gotten along with girls, and besides I have been so scared to have people close to me because they just get hurt and do't understand my disorder or I cannot communicate my problems to them well enough it just turns into a fight. Like the issue with the abortion I am still hurting and need comfort but I live with my grandmother and I try to talk to her about it, she acts like its old news and acts like I am doing something wrong by still feeling hurt feeling over it. She doesn't want to hear it she tell me to get over it and move on with my life, just becuase she has had it done and got over it faster than I am. Or maybe she do not remember how bad it hurt and for how long because she is not young anymore and she has no man and has no life like I have made myself. I see myself going down the same road, just getting numb to everything and get to the point where you don't care if you are awake or asleep, alive or dead, happy or in pain you just go through life and let stuff happen to you without trying to make it to a certain goal or change the future so it can be better. I want better future, and free of feeling like I made a mistake, I am only going to be 20 years old in january 24th 2010 and I have already been faced with this challenge of keeping a baby or not, I felt love for the baby, and I saw the ultrasound and the baby wasn't nothing but a fertilize egg still, and was nothing in the eyes of the people that came to clinic with me, but I saw something so much different and it feel like it kill me inside what I did. . . I guess I just am rambling now I stop talking I suppose. ~shayna~ Posted on 10/21/09, 07:10 pm |
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I got an abortion when I was in my late 20's am now 54 and it still bothers me your a senstive person maybe thats why it bothers you so much your going to greive at your own pace. I have 2 children a daughter 28 and a son 25 and I pasted my bipolar on to them was diagnoised at 38. which I feel guilty about.. keep a journal write down your feelings it might help you to use that as an out lit I keep a DEAR GOD journal your in my prayers. I took a girlfriend to an abortion clinic it was hard on me I realize some women think its no big deal I'm just not one of them if I had it to do all over again I will still get the abortion 
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Hi babe I totally get were you are I had an abortion in January of this year (there my sin for all the world to see) I was in the opposite situation from you my partner of 8yrs wanted me to have it because he doesn't like the idea I am sor sorry no-one supported you remember it is a life and its only natural that you would grieve I am but like others for me it was the right decision and it is something you always regret but I tell myself it wasn't fare to the family I had already (3 kids) I wasn't in a place to cope ..
I think you should get some councelling definetely as I feel cognitive and grief councelling are what helped me cope Its like someone else said its done now no going back only forward. Perhaps with a more considerate and understanding boyfriend after all its your body sounds to me like you are still angry with others involved fuck there feelings this is about you tell thamn how you feel. I was very hateful towards my partner as he didn't even visit me and it all went wrong I was in hospital for 3 days not even a phone call to ask were I was. Look after yourself you deserve it. HUgs p.s. sorry blethering on abit chaoticaly think I,m maybe going for a Hypo. my email is nickwit05@aol.com if you want to chat
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God loves you all!
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Dear Kitty,
I pray peace, comfort, and full healing from this pain for you, from our Heavenly Father. Your loved ones were very wrong to make you feel pressured to have an abortion, and it is more than OK to feel angry, sad, or whatever you feel...ir is natural and healthy! I agree that it is far better than numb. I can tell you from personal experience that numb is hard to get back from. Due to medical reasons, I will most likely never get pregnant...and that is a hurt for me, that I am now just letting myself feel. My family didn't think my feelings about that subject were important, and to just get over it. Sometimes the people we are close to, just don't get it. Anyway, I will pray for you, and I am here for you if you need a friend to chat with, or to listen to. I have strong pro life beliefs..but I do not judge you at all, for your choice, or for your pro life stance. I have made choices in my past that I wish to God-literally, that I hadn't. Jesus is our loving friend, and no sin is worse than another. If you recieve the Lord into your heart, and give your life for Him to mend and make whole, then heaven is your home, and you will see your baby there someday. I agree that grief counseling will probably be really good for you...when you are ready, of course. Perhaps starting out in the DS bereavement group? Or writing letters to your boyfriend and family memebers who harmed you...which you may or may not send, but the point is that you get that awful anger out of your system. Sorry to ramble on, lol. May the Lord bless you. Here is a big warm hug for you. XX.
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So sorry that u had to go through that sweetie but i believe there is forgiveness in the eyes of the Lord. I went through a similar situation so i know how u feel. I recently had a baby October 12 2009 many people were against me having a baby since i was on meds but i put everything in the hands of the Lord and everything worked out fine. I am here if u need me. I believe there is a support group on here for people who had an abortion. Best of wishes xxxxx
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You don't need forgiveness. I have to stop getting email updates to this thread. It depresses me every time someone implies you've somehow sinned. You have not. But I'm sure it still hurts and I hope you find peace.
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Judge not lest you be judged
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I'm sorry you're going through this. Like you and several others who have already posted a reply, I also had an abortion. Unlike you, I did so willingly, but I still grieve for the life that could've been. Because you were pushed into this, I can't even imagine the extent of your pain, but I do think it will eventually lessen. You need to forgive yourself, not because it was a sin(because I don't think it was), but because it was a decision you made that you didn't really want to do and now regret.
As much as the past hurts and haunts us, we can't change it. All we can do is move forward and bear the painful memories untill we create good ones to balance the scales in our minds. You also might want to consider whether or not you'll ever be able to forgive your boyfriend. It was an awful thing to pressure you into an abortion and, in my opinion, an unforgivable action. If thats the case for you as well, that you can't forgive him, then maybe it would be better to leave him. He's not helping your grief because he's not feeling any and not helping your healing because he doesn't understand the need for it. As much as you love him and as much as he may love you, maybe he's not what you need right now. Take care of yourself. Remember that things can always get better, but healing takes time.
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