Bipolar Disorder Support Group

I am not sure what you are on medication wise and what you are being treated for, but I have been in the same suicide place that you are now. I can only say that for me I had to get on the right cocktail of meds to help me. I know myself and I know when I need to be in the hospital for my thoughts. You might consider checking into a psych hospital for a few days. It helped me so much. I am sending lots of hugs your way.

Call the psychiatrist and see if you can get in for an emergency meeting.

You have to find a med combination that works for you because side effects can be very dangerous.

Nutrition with meds can help and you can also discuss that with your psychiatrist and a nutritionist.

Thanks, I took the meds for only 2 weeks 9 months ago. I now have some brain damage along with a few other damages mainly nervous system, kidneys. I can't take anymore meds that will alter my brain chemistry, after the damage the ones I took caused I am very leary of taking anything pharmaceutical. I have taken about 20 different AD's and none of them worked. I tried taking a new med just over a week ago and my brain felt funny. I can't believe this has happened. Pharmacy should have caight the interaction...don't trust a drug store connected to a grocery store in my opinion. Only a drug store that sells only pharmacy related items know and care about customers. This is my opinion but I have damage to prove this.

I am so sorry about what happened to you. I can relate and I understand. I feel trapped in my own body. I believe I have damage I do not feel the same either as when I had depression. I never feel tired. I have lost the totally ability to fall asleep on my own. This has been going on for 2 and half years. On top of it I have major digestive issues which I believe is from damage. I try to think of the positives, at least I am not in pain but I do not see how I will ever recover or be normal again. It is very sad and I have suicide thoughts but I am afraid it wouldn't work and I would end up even worse than I am now. I look awful, my hair is falling out, dark circles under eyes very pale I can't believe I am still working. I feel the same I want to hide and die. I come home from work everday and do nothing don't enjoy anything basically I am miserable. I have been to so many doctors with no help. I do not believe in the medical system anymore they just want to throw drugs at you to cover up symptoms. I do believe the medications are necessary for certain people and conditions. I hope you can get some relief soon and that you will heal and feel better. Have you tried any supplements or vitamins?

Would you ever consider vitamins or other natural products. I do realize just because its natural doesn't mean its safe. If you want to know more info on nat. supplements a medical or nursing handbook on the subject I think are your most reliable, objective source. They are pricy but maybe you can go to a med. library and look up one there.

Thanks for the replies. I have taken natural supplements for almost my entire life but now I have to be real careful about anything now that I have serious kidney damage. I feel the exact same way regarding medications, there is something scary about a company that produces the drug is also doing the testing and only publishing the positive results! Natural supplements are for me way more effective than synthetic fluoride based treatments...for me anyways. The whole serotonin theory is so full of holes ripley wouldn't believe it. After taking the meds for two days I was very ill and I mentioned to my fiancee that these pills were making me feel crappy and She insisted I take them for two weeks...which I did under duress. Now, I am pretty much ill from head to toe and my eye muscles have severe damage...this is really tough and I feel this might be my last weekend.

What medications caused this damage to you?

I'm so sorry your in so much pain! But really, my biggest worry is your still going to the same Doctor!!!!!

I tried to get a new dr. but there were no specialists available. It is VERY hard to get a new dr. where I live and impossible to get a new pdoc without a referral. I saw a weirdo pdoc in January that told me there weren't any pdoc's accepting new patients. I have an appt. for a new family dr. in August but I don't think I can hold on that long...I will hopefully be done by the middle of this week if things work out. With the brain/kidney/digestive/nervous system/muscle damage I am foolish to think I can make a life for myself...wayyyyy too much damage. The meds I took were an old tricyclic that was combined with lithium and the dosages were prescribed too high and my pdoc approved taking some natural supplements. Problem was, the medication I was given can't be taken with anything...literally. Have a serious legal case against the dr. but Fiancee says we are finished if I sue the dr. I see the dr. this coming week and I need to literally take my file and photocopy it and a lawyer will have their way with him...provided he hasn't changed his notes already. This is probably too late to even get into since I am finished already and just have to get past the fear of death...a little harder than I thought.

I wish you could channel your grit and determination into living!!

Is all the damage you described permanent and irreversible, or is it possible that some healing will take place over time?

You sound exhausted. Is there something you could do to invigorate yourself?