Bereavement - Teens Support Group

I've never really been extremely close to my step brother, but I have known him all of my life. After high school, he seemed to be getting off track. He hitch hiked to Chicago and joined a different church and changed his name. He was pretty thoughtful of me and would take me to play laser tag and do things like that. He did not get along with our dad though, so it was sometimes hard to see him. Then, I heard that he had turned gay. I was just really confused about that, so I kinda distanced myself from him. I felt bad cuz he would always call me on my birthday, but I never answered. Because he went gay, his wife left him. He had depression. One day, he shot himself in the mouth. They found that he had been off of his medication for a while. Also, another thing that made me mad was that my other step brother said that they had discussed suicide and ways to do it. He was so stupid to do that! Its like motivating him to do it. When I found out that he had killed himself, I didn't really feel anything. I felt guilty for not feeling. At the funeral, I exploded. I was crying more than anyone, and I couldn't stop and could barely talk. I feel bad for rejecting him, and wish I would have just loved him.
Posted on 11/04/09, 08:11 am