Bereavement Support Group

sometimes i hesitate to post replies because i don't want to say the wrong thing. so i'm only telling you what i did. my sister died six weeks ago. it was a traumatic death. i was very close to her and i am still devastated. everyday i still think it was a bad dream and i'll wake up. but i know it's not a bad dream. i finally went to my dr. she put me on antidepressants. i hate taking any medications. i always thought, i'm a strong woman, i don't need meds. i was wrong. i take the meds everyday, somedays are better than others, but i've made the choice to try the antidepressants. my goal is to eventually not to have to take them anymore, but i also know if i have to take them for the rest of my life, so be it. i will get through this, i will. i also go to support groups. it was hard at first, but now i've found new friends that understand exactly how i feel because they feel the same way. i don't want to do anything anymore. the things i used to enjoy, mean nothing to me. but someday i know i'll get back to those things, or i'll find new things. don't be too hard on yourself. take what you will from what i've said. just know you aren't alone in all of this. there are alot of people here that will listen and tell their story and take what you can from that. thinking of you,
Shirley

Hi jgajda1. I think it is very normal for grief to hit us differently at various times after our losses. I thought I was doing good after my losses this year and then a few weeks later, things went to H*ll for me. I'm doing better now, but like Sandy said, sometimes I think it's a dream. I can't believe I've lost my family members sometimes. Hang in there and if you need to, contact your doctor about what might help you get through this. For me, the anti-depressant has helped with dad and brothers passing.

I hope you get feeling better soon. Hugs to you!

Hi, my heart goes out to you. I lost my husband suddenly 2 1/2 years ago and I can tell you from my experience, time deadens the pain somewhat but not completely. I still cry every single day for Matt and that's OK. I started dating a gentleman about 10 months ago and he dumped me on Sunday so I'm feeling the pain all over again and missing Matt more and more. I too am on a double dose of antidepressants and they do help. Maybe you should consider talking to your doctor. Please be kind to yourself. You've been thru a lot.

You know what-Keep loving Matt and to Hell with that guy that "dumped" you. Thw world is full of jerks like that and yes Time does heal a lot but never completely.

I just hate selfish guys who play the use them and dump them game and especially to vulnerable people. Yeah, I guess I am having a really bad day after all but things like that really make me angry. Stay Strong.

Reading the last post incensed me and I forgot about Jgajda1..sorry about that. I think Matttslove gave you the best advice though Jg..it's gonna take time. Maybe you can get closer to your sister during this time if that helps. Damn, I wish I had all the answers, but of course I don't. Hang in there and give it time.

And there I go forgetting to post a reply to Sandyslilsis. I am very sorry about your loss..actually if I posted to anyone today and forgot to say I was sorry about their loss I apologize as I'm not in the best of moods today..but have to respond to some things that bother me for some reason.

I have only one sister. She is my younger sister and just after the death of my Mom I don't know what would happen if something God forbid were ever to happen to her. I can only guess at what you are going through and I know it is one of the hardest things in your life going through this. So whatever you need to do to help you get over it--if it's medication so be it.

Medication in such circimstances is not the criteria that defines whether you are weak or strong. So don't think about that twice please. Listen to your doctors advice..do what your intelligence and heart tells you to do. sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders from what you wrote and will pull out of this ok.

Like war, seeing or hearing someone killed violently is something that can stay with you a long time..especially your own blood or dear friend. Time is your greastest ally and ..another thing..I find I am responding to more than one person on a main post..all your answers have brought out your losses and pains where it affected me to the point where I had to respond.

I didn't forget about you either dadsgirl1. I am very sorry for your losss and what you are going through physically yourself. You're alive and talking, and have interests. You also have Grandchildren and although grieving you are focusing on those positive things. More than I can say for myself at this point. I believe you will pull through this better than you think at the end. God, what a great group of people here-Keep helping each other!

This really has to be my last post for today. I couldn't leave without posting to dadsgirl1 though. :-)

and Justme, thank you. when I saw all your posts it made me smile. Your mind goes like mine, 1000 thoughts a minute. And I agree, there are alot of good people here and I do find comfort here.