What is Bereavement
Grief is a multi-faceted response to loss. Although conventionally focused on the emotional response to loss, it also has a physical, cognitive, behavioural, social and philosophic...
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i really don't know what to do
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ok so my grandfather passed away a little over 2 months ago and i am very heart broken by this. we were really close i'm 15 and he was rly the only person i could really talk to. my grandma who was his wife of 60 years , is having a really hard time coping with it. its totally understandable, but when she comes over to my house to take a break from being lonely at her condo, she is so sad and talks about all the sad things that she misses about him. i am happy to listen to her, but the only problem is i'm not rly ready to talk about him, it just makes me sad and i feel like crying. I can't cry in front of my grandma because i HAVE to be strong for her, and i have to help take care of her while she is at my house, so i'm around sadness alot and i really just don't know how to deal with this can someone please help me?
Posted on 10/04/09, 11:10 am |
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I'm so sorry for your loss. I don't think it would hurt if you sat and cried with your grandma. Do you know that crying releases endorphines that make you feel better? Tears serve a purpose. Yes do keep an eye on her though. When seniors lose a spouse it can be overwhelming for them. As for talikng, you do need some help with this. So parents are out? What about counselors at school? No? OK, there are these bereavement support groups at some of the hospices. Call around and see what is available. A group like that helped me a lot. There are also some good books on bereavement. Have a look at Amazon. It helps to understand the grieving process and what lies ahead for you.
About your grandma telling sad stories, what about trying to remember and discuss the happy times with granddad? I wish you well. Scott 
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Hi and I'm very sorry about losing your grandpa. I think Scott46 had a lot of great suggestions. My suggestion was goiong to be to try and talk to grandma about the happy times, as he suggested. This may still lead to a good cry from the both of you, but it might also help your grandma turn a corner and begin to see the happy memories of her husband. I hope you get through this OK and just remember, you have to give yourself time and it is very OK to cry.
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I thought some more about this. Another reason to let your grandma know how you are feeling is that it will give her an opportunity to be strong for you. This is a time to pull together and lean on each other. It might make her feel needed. Just a thought.
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