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Friday May 24, 2013
Frustrating Stories
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i am SO frusterated. i cant even eat now. im so scared to...this is so hard. my mom ordered a pizza last night because i wasnt about to touch that chicken again. and i ate a piece, but pretty much just the bread of it. when i woke up this morning i could feel i was hungry...but also scared to eat. so i made something ive always liked...frosted flakes. i ate maybe 5 small spoonfuls of it and had t...
1 Recommendation
3 CommentsAdvertisementI'm basically having an internal war. I eat too much so I stop and don't eat the next meal. I look up pictures of gorgeous women and get mad at myself for allowing myself to be fat. I could look like that. There is no reason I shouldn't. Except in a piece of shit. A fat piece of shit. So I don't eat. I go to bed early, complaining that I'm tired when really I'm just ravenous and don't trust mysel...1 Recommendation3 CommentsI MUST lose weight-my health is not good and I know my self indulgence has greatly affected me
I have tried many times before but the cravings win and I quit. I do not weigh myself as I become easily discouraged, I will know I am making progress as my clothing will be loose-I want to start by going down 2 sizes
Would appeciate any prayers and thoughts of support.1 Recommendation3 CommentsSo I always thought the idea was it was always darkest before dawn. I always find mornings to be the one period of the day with little anxiety, then as the day progresses the levels build and build, untill towards the end of the day I crack and begin to be more irritable than usual, and eventually become so tired and worn out from fighting myself that I can not function any longer.
Today st...1 Recommendation2 CommentsWell I had a great week last week, kept my gs for four days while daughter and lowlifes flew to LA to tape Judge Judy.......she came back, hungover and tired so I went ahead and stayed another day to bathe and feed him and get him to school.......how can you not see your kid for four days and be to tired to bother with him or give him any attention??? SELFISH SELFISH SELFISH.....unbeleivvable, CP...1 Recommendation3 CommentsToday I have been dizzy and having hot flashes. I know I have not ate much but I am not shakey so I don't think it's my sugars that are down. I have had a headache for the past 3 days now and I keep taking tylenol for them. I feel tired and don't have a lot of energy. I don't know if it's because I'm sick or what's going on. I know I still have a cold and cough but why would that cause me to...1 Recommendation2 CommentsLast evening I sent Amanda an email, I told her the reason I attempted suicide was because I could no longer standby and watch her being mentally abused by San. I told her I am not proud, nor am I condoning the choice I made. I only wanted her to know what triggered, this tragic event, which has cause her and my family emotional turmoil. I also explained to her, that I did not c...1 Recommendation3 CommentsI see couples aot on these New York City streets. I am 31, single, lonely, sick, and depressed. What is worst I am a black nigga who is broke. It's bad enough niggas don't get love. I see people making out alot. I see babies and people with dogs giving the dogs love. I feel so empty, alone, ugly, isolated, and like a fucking bum. No one loves me anymore. In high school, I was bullied. My father n...3 Recommendations7 CommentsI am so confused as to what I should do. I looked up saphris, reviews that people who tried it, and are currently taking it, the reviews are mixed, some say it caused lots of weight gain, and excessive tiredness, others say it is the best they've felt in years, that it helped with depression and anxiety. I haven't decided whether or not I want to try it. I just feel like my pdoc...1 Recommendation4 CommentsI woke up this morning, mood very low, ate breakfast and went back to bed, woke up early afternoon and felt somewhat better. Got showered, dressed, and went out to dinner with my parents. I even took a clonopin to help keep my mood even. Well about halfway thru the meal, I started spiraling down again.
I am so unstable, I'm so tired of fighting this illness. I don't know h...1 Recommendation2 Comments
