What is Alzheimers Disease
Alzheimer's disease (AD), a neurodegenerative disease, is the most common cause of dementia and characterized clinically by progressive cognitive deterioration together with declin...
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How to handle embarrassment??
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I am 25 years old and dont get embarrassed by much. Times are VERY different now than they were in my grandmothers youth. She has dementia/alzheimer's and is in a nursing home with my grandpa. I am VERY involved with my grandparents and am lucky enough to have them in a home that is a short distance from me so I get to visit often. My aunt went today cus things have been hectic since we just moved to a new apt. She said she walked down my grandparents wing and my grandma was in her wheelchair by the bathroom door and had a BM accident in her pants and had been digging behind her back in her BM and had it everywhere. My aunt put the call light on so she could have help cleaning her up, but my grandma was just crying hysterically. She just kept putting her hands in front of her face saying "I.......I.......I...." and crying, crying crying and more crying. How do you help them over the embarrassments? The accidents, the incidents. I just want to make this all better for her. :(
Posted on 09/04/09, 08:09 pm |
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I do not know the answer to your questions... I'm just glad that your grandparents have such a loving, thoughtful grandaughter........ You guys are all lucky to have one another......your story brought tears to my eyes I can really feel your pain................
Pamela 
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Dear, there is no one answer to all these problems with this terrible disease. * Sorry* Just try to handle each situation as best you can. If Mom is having a pretty clear day, I will say something like, "Honey, it's just some of that medicine you take makes this happen, or Mom, this happens to all of us at one time or another."
I'm so glad your grandparents have a loving family like you to visit and let them know they are loved. Some of the folks in the NH where Mom is never have a visitor and it's so sad. Keep up the good work and stay strong. Hugs and Prayers, Joy
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First Thank you for not just forgetting yoru grandparents....thank you for caring and I am sure if they could they would tell you how much it means to them. I don't have answers to your question but I can tell you that from their point of view it is horrible --- can you imagine.....what if it was you in that shape. Comfort - love - compassion and a little laughter will get you both through it. Just always think about how you would feel. I am convienced that they may not be albe to verbalize things but internally they know and they are scared and horrified. Stay strong.
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Comfort, calm approach, a little humor...all of these seems to settle an episode like this down so you can help address it. Just like with little children, if you show shock when they scrape their knee, if you pick them up and laugh it off, most times they will too.
Relate this to a personal incident "grandma, I've peed my pants just laughing too hard sometimes too"...sometimes knowing they aren't alone helps. Try to stay calm, address the issue and change the topic and find something comforting...have a cup of tea, a little ice cream, listen to music.... This helps redirect my Dad and most times within a very short period, he's forgotten what happened, or at least it isn't as traumatic. One of the only blessings of this disease is that they don't recall some of these moments. Bless you for helping watch over them and being so kind. I'm sure they just adore you and appreciate what you do so much. Big hugs.
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It's so sad to see your loved one in this situation. It happens with my Mom and I try to be as matter a fact as possible. She is horrified when it happens and I just say, you know Mom, it happens to everybody sometime and, as some of you have said, the calmer you remain, the better. What a great granddaughter you are. Your parents must be so proud of you. It's a heartbreaking disease for sure. I have found that my situation has helped me incredibly be a more patient, understanding person.
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