What is Alcoholism
Alcoholism is a powerful craving for alcohol which often results in the compulsive consumption of alcohol, an addiction. The cause of this craving is heavily debated, but the most ...
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The Emotional Pain of Abstinence
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In the beginning I thought that drinking was my problem when I walked into AA.
I too had not yet made the decision that I have Alcoholism till I had some listening under my belt from meetings. I got it, I own it, now what? The pain of abstaining started around the third or fourth day, my mother remembers me crying in the darkness of the living room, begging God to help me. She could not understand. It became perfectly clear that abstinence caused a major emotional explosion within but for some reason I kept going. Going or rather running into the rooms of AA where I felt safe and in the right place. Nothing anyone said to the negative would affect me except piss this head strong alkie off and still I heard the voices of those who had found a solution. Around 60 plus days, the compulsion and obsession for alcohol left and I didn't realize it. It just vanished! By then, loaded with the hope given to me from now, some friends, I was busy doing service work via a man who became my sponsor. Through the years of practicing these Steps (how) and the Traditions (why) I have had to go through pain to the levels of how deep my defects/shortcomings had truly ruled my behaviors. Emotional hangovers were abundant at times, but that goes along with change, abstinence of behaviors is not easy when knowing you have to. Drinking is but a symptom. The old thinking and attitudes towards life are but symptoms. Finally growing up is a symptom. Respect is a symptom. Self esteem is a symptom. Laughing is a symptom. Having the capacity to have all human emotions is a symptom. Freedom from the bondage of self is a symptom, healthy relationships are a symptom, Etc. These symptoms of sobriety are possible from different methods of recovery. I am a member of AA. The pain caused from abstinence, a most necessary part of honesty, will not kill you. I found that I had wished I could have abstained sooner than I did but it happened exactly when it was suppose to. This journey has been an eye opener, an absolute trip into the promises! YEA BUDDY! Posted on 11/04/09, 05:11 pm |
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Three months of abstinence without a way to deal with the real problem and I ended up in a mental hospital. 
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Refusing to abstain landed me in prison at 10 years. Full of false pride, self righteousness, and still, buried fear. More does get, revealed!
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Yes Mark...... more does get revealed..... hmmmmmm?
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good post bbh, i too thoguht that the problem was just drinking but when i put down the drink i realized i had many underlining issues i needed to deal with, years i drunk away feelings and emotions that when i put the drink down i knew that putting down the drink was just the beginning.. i was the problem and my way of thinkin etc.. it was all backwards if that makes sense...
drink to me was just the symptom i had to face the one person i hated and that was MYSELF. GOOD post
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props to you BB. I abstained for 7 years in the 90s. Got me no cure. Just delayed the work, the healing, the living.
For today I say NO MORE! When I wake tomorrow I will, with all my might, try for another today. PEACE
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