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Hi Everyone! I'm new. Please read. :)
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Hi guys. I've just signed upto this site on a friend's recommendation. Looks good and I'm feeling pretty positive. :) I went looking for a supportive online community because for the best part of my adult life I've been battling an alcohol problem which I managed to get under control while I was having my son, but seem to have slipped into old patterns since starting my degree late last year. My son never sees me drink and I always drink when he's in bed. I always worry that people wont take my problem seriously as I have never been a morning drinker and don't suffer the physical effects of alcohol withdrawal, however I do drink every night, often on my own, and can rarely stop until all the alcohol is gone, and then will sometimes go to great lengths to get more alcohol.
My drinking was alot worse a few years ago. I was a complete mess for a long time, and in a mentally and physically abusive relationship that didn't help the situation. When I managed to get out of the relationship the drinking seemed to get slightly better on it's own, and I met my partner and fell pregnant, so then drinking wasn't an option, but since having my son I've felt my resolve slipping. I get to a certain point after he's in bed and I have work to do (I'm studying for a degree in history) and I'll get the overwhelming urge to have a drink. I have an active social life but I'm very aware that I don't have the same relationship with alcohol that "normal" people do. My friends can go out and have a drink and it wont lead to them having to drink every night that week, or they can go out and just have one or two drinks and I wish I could have those normal drinking habits. My relationship with alcohol is always just teetering on that fine line between me being in control of it and it being in control of me. I think it's important I tackle this now, not just because I know where it can lead, but also because I think it's important for my son to grow up with a responsible attitude to drinking alcohol. He'll soon get to an age where he'll know what's going on, and I will want to be setting a good and sensible example. Any advice or support will be gratefully welcomed. Thanks for reading. :) xx Posted on 07/10/12, 04:51 pm |
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Your not alone in the way you feel. Someone said once "you don't have to hit rock bottom to see rock bottom" makes sense to me. Keeping the journal is really helpful. I also like the check in threads @ www.smartrecovery.org both of these tools have helped me. 
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helo there.if u start drinking and cant stop no matter what plans u may have when u start.your probably an alcoholic.when we take a drink we start a craving beyond our control and when we are not drinking we are obsessing about it.i was introduced to aa 8 years ago by a pal i grew up with in south london.i expected men stinking of urine jn raincoats but instead i found a room full of people laughing n joking n who looked totally normal.this baffled me but i sat and listened and identified imediately with what was being said.ive tried lots of ways to stop drinking and always got drunk.i cant stress enough that aa will set u on ur way to recovery and a few simple steps will keep u happy m sober.go to a meeting,get a sponser do the steps n in the meantime buy the big book of alcoholics annonymous n read it.good luck this is an illness that will only get worse if left untreated:)
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Hello ChaosIsAFriendOfMine,
You are very welcome to the D.S. alcohol forum. If you keep drinking it is likely that it will get worse and will become impossible to hide so you are wise to do something about it now. Some people can quit drinking and stay sober on their own willpower or by using programmes such as Smart Recovery. However, there is a high percentage of alcoholics who have gone past the point where willpower alone is of much use. These people need help and it has been well proven that AA can help them where all else fails. That has been my experience. I could not stop drinking or stay stopped and had lost all hope. Thanks to AA the urge to drink has been gone for a long time. Keep looking until you find something that works for you.
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You say you want to stop and offer some good reasons why that's a good idea for you to do.
I agree with your thinking on the matter and the decision you've made. Hold yourself to that. As you described it you believe the well-being of your son is on the line, so any further drinking will harm his best interests. If his lifetime health and happiness turns out to be a poor and insufficient motivation for you to remain sober, then there are other options you can utilize to accomplish that goal. By trying with all your might to remain sober you'll either succeed or you'll understand a little more about the nature of the challenges you'll be facing throughout the rest of his childhood.
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Hi my name is Nancy and I am a Alcoholic
Wow can I relate as the housewife that drank alone at home after the children were asleep never thinking I was doing any harm. After sobering up with A.A.'s help it was mentioned what if there had been an emergency and I needed to take one of them to the hospital if they awoke sick these are things I never thought about possibly happening grateful it didn't yet it could and then what? I now have an empty nest except what I thought I was hiding just fooling myself 2 of my 4 children have been through treatment for Alcoholism one is about ready to be homeless again with my 8 year old grandson very scary yet until she is ready to give it up all I can do is pray my oldest son almost 29 just relapsed again his precious wife tired of it all is filing for a divorce have two small grandchildren there that will be affected our disease affects so many so please do what you have to do to never take that first drink ever again page 5 of staying sober as it triggers that allergic reaction in those of us who cannot stop once we start that is why get ahold of an A.A. Big Book they even sell them at half price book stores read through the Doctors Opinion found my own story in the back of the book the housewife that drank alone I am now free this one day from those ugly chains of Alcohol that did not allow me to really enjoy or have a life I now enjoy playing with my grandchildren,gardening and just plain going to A.A. meetings as I cannot do it on my own been there tried that keeping you in my prayers. GOD BLESS XXOO
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I totally know where you are coming from. I just decided to stop and my first day was yesterday. I, to, longed for the "normal" drinking habits and witnessed people stopping with contentment. Not me, however, I would keep going. I have committed myself to joining AA and have downloaded the books online, I don't believe willpower for me will be enough. I don't want to see my daughter fall into this terrible pattern later in life and she is now getting old enough to start understanding.....Welcome to the group! I have already found great encouragement here! *hugs*
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Wecome to DS! You will find suggestions and support here. And a bunch of people who are dedicated to sharing their journey to sobriety with you in hopes that you too get and stay sober.
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Welcome! I guess you see that it gets worse over time... and that continues. When you need to control it, you've lost control.
Abstinence is really the only way to go. How you choose to stay abstinent is up to you. I have a great life through the program of AA.
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If chaos really is your friend and that's the way you like it, then anything I might say will be inappropriate.
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Tis! true! .......Welcome!
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