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I've been suffering from panic attacks for a few months now. My first attack was at my gma's house and I ended up in the hospital and ever since then I've always had anxiety going back to her house. I have a bug family so we're always visiting each other and we're rarely home. Anyways at first I could control it but I was having constant anxiety every time I went somewhere, especially if I had to go back to my gma's house where I first experienced the panic. Anyways, it got so severe that I started skipping out on events and would only go out half the time I used to. At this point I had to start my new job and it was really stressful. My new bosses are complete assholes (sorry for the language lol) and this made me have A LOT of anxiety while working there. One day while working my boss made a rude comment to me and I was so fed up with all the stress from them before that I ended up completely breaking down while at work! My aunt works at the same store and when I went to go sit in the back to try and calm down she came in with the boss and they started arguing, so long story short I ended up balling y eyes out in front of everyone because of everything that was going on and I couldn't control the anxiety. After this episode I haven't been able to leave my house without experiencing severe anxiety. I don't go anywhere anymore and I've spent the last 5 days inside my house. I haven't even been on my porch for a week!! It has never been this bad and I don't know what to do about it :(
I have one major problem coming up this weekend which is why i decided to write to you guys. As most people know the euro cup is happening right now. I'm Italian and or team made it to the finals, which is great...but to celebrate the big game my cousins want me to go to the Italian club in town and watch the game there. This is the main spot that people go to watch and it will be PACKED with people! And if we win they'll want to go downtown to celebrate and they're will be even more people! I want to go but I don;t know if I'll be able to..and even if I do get there all be worrying the whole time and I might now even make it through the whole game, let alone go downtown after. I wont be driving either so if I start to get really bad I wont even be able to leave and the club is REALLY far from my house. There's going to be a lot of people and excitement and yelling and I usually get depersonalized when I'm in hectic places like that. Anyways I want to go but I don't know what to do to control my panic attacks when I leave now. I just want to be able to have fun and really enjoy the game because it might be awhile until I get to do something like this again! :( Does anyone have any suggestions or advice that might help with my situation? How do I cope with it and stop my agoraphobia? What do I do to help me make it through the game? Any thoughts are appreciated!! I just want to get back to my normal me :( Thanks for reading and sorry its so long! Posted on 06/30/12, 12:57 am |
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I know exactly what you're going through. I have a lot of problems with agoraphobia and anxiety, and it's really hard for me to go out around a lot of people. In August, I have a family function coming up, and I dread it so bad. I plan on going, but I have a plan in place if it gets to be too much for me. I made sure that I have an emergency ride to take me home early if I needed to. If this plan falls apart, I'll have cab fare. But before it gets to that point, I plan on stepping outside and breathe. We'll see if it works. I also had a meltdown at work a few years ago. The first time I worked by myself as a barista, I ended up crying and shaking on the floor behind the cart, then in the bathroom, then on the phone to my mom. So, if you really want to go, you could always try to do baby steps first, and venture out farther and farther, or put some kind of "escape plan" in place. I hope all goes well for you! 
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maybe you could a few people come over to your house and watch it with you, i know how you feel. i am scared to go outside too. if you ready want to go there. then you could take baby step. go outside for a few minute every day then add more minute when you feel like you are ready. i hope things get better for you. hugs
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I walked out to the grocery store today which, sadly enough, was a surprise since I haven't been anywhere in a while but I didn't have to much anxiety it would work up at times but I could just focus and breath and most times it would work. But I was by myself and usually i'm better on my own but there will be A LOT of people at the game tomorrow yelling and screaming and that always makes my anxiety worse so I don't know what I should do once that starts? and I'm 18 and going with my older cousins so they're driving and they won't be able to drive me back if it gets to be too much and they won't let me take a cab home..they just don't get it and think its all in my head and i can stop it anytime i want. So if i go ill be stuck there no matter what and this thought make my anxiety about the whole thing worse! Starting with baby steps sounds like a good idea but this whole thing happened all of a sudden and the games tomorrow so I didn't have time for baby steps :( I went out to the store today to try and work on it but it was only one day. I'm afraid of what will happen if I go from staying in the house for 5 days straight to putting myself in the hectic environment at the club. I want to go...but I don't know what to do, I don't know if I'll be ok going and I'm worried. I can't have people at my house (even though that would be so much better) because my cousins are basically forcing me to go and they refuse to go anywhere else but the club. They'll be really mad if I don't go so I don't know what I'm should do!! :(
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As for work I haven't been given any shifts after that happened so we'll see how it goes.. I might have to look for a new job which would be really stressful but I don't know what else I can do. I'm hoping this new boss will call me soon and give me a few shifts to get back on track but we'll see. And Thanks guys for reading and sharing your experiences and advice, I appreciate it! :)
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that true some people do not unstanding how we feel when we go outside. your cousin need to ustanding that it not so easy for you to just get up and go to a crowd place. it would be dumb for them to be mad that you did not want to go and have panic attack. did you try to get them to unstanding how you feel? sound like they need to be more support of you and try to help you.
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I've tried explaining what happens to me during attacks and when i go out but they just don't get it, especially since this just happened to me all of a sudden, i never used to have anxiety or that much social anxiety. I used to love going out with my family to stuff like this, I was always shy at school or around class mates and friends of friends, but I was never afraid to go anywhere before. They just don't understand how one day i can have all of this anxiety, if i've never had it before in my life, that's why they don't believe me when I try explaining to them how bad it is. To be honest I don't understand it myself..it just really sucks :( I went to the game on sunday and I was really nervous before my cousin came to pick me up but I just breathed and went on the computer to distract myself until she got here. Then I calmed down once she was there and I started talking with everyone but I was still pretty anxious. I never had a full blown attack at the club (which was good) but the whole time I was thinking about my anxiety and if it would happen or not and I couldn't even focus on the game or the people around me. I was so focused on what might happen to me that I couldn't enjoy being there. I actually hoped we would loose in the back of my mind just so i could get home faster. I also went to my aun'ts house today with the family for canada's day but I was still focusing on my anxiety and didn't have any fun there either. I'm so fed up with all of this because i just want to be how i used to be. Before I would have had fun and enjoyed the game and just being with everyone but I cant anymore. I don't know what to do because even when i do go out all my mind thinks about is how fast i can get home and when it will be over.
Also I've been experiencing depersonalization with my anxiety, does anyone have this too? It gets a lot worse when I go out places too. I've been trying to ask others about it but not a lot of people have given answers. I'm just trying to find out more about all this, i'm sorry for the long response.
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that good that you did not have a panic attack at the club. i am proud of you. keep up the great work. i do unstanding how you feel. i know it can be hard to go outside. i am not sure when i start to have this problem. i know i did not have this when i was little kid. i rember go place with my family. i think it might had start when i was in high school or after high school. when i go i feel so nevous and scared. when i do go outside my bf goes with me. that help little bit.
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I am sorry you are going through this. There are so many of us that understand how you feel and hate the feeling of having anxiety and panic attacks. Have you ever thought of seeing someone about your anxiety? There are many medications out there that will help some of your problems. I know that wont help you right now at this moment.
I also suffer with being afraid to leave my home, sometimes Im scared even at my own house. I am on meds that help but I still have panic attacks. My best advise to you, would be to just give it a try and go with your cousin and let her/him know ahead of time the issues you are dealing with and have them agree that if you say you need to leave they will be willing to leave and bring you home. If you go and end up leaving thats still progress at least you gave it effort, you may go and have anxiety. If I go out in public and get afraid I usually go to the restroom and just a minute to myself and breathe and try to let some of the anxiety go if I cant I let whomever Im with know that I need to leave. I have a extremely understanding husband that helps me through my problems so it makes it a lot easier. I wish you the best of luck and I hope you got something out of this long message that can help you :)
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