Parenting 'Tweens (9-12) Support Group

I personally don't see any reason why a middle school aged child needs a cell phone. I have told s when she is old enough to drive and work then she can have one. There is only one 14 year old I know that is mature enough for a cell phone and he actually needs it because of all of the different sports and activity's he's in. The only advice I can give you is to get rid of the cell phone or call the company and have them disable the texting service. You could also look into one of those emergency kids cell phones that only allow your child to call people you have programed into the phone. I'm not sure how well they work but it might be worth looking into.

my kids only get cell phones when they are involved in an activity that has no set end time like marching band. my son got his phone summer before 8th grade when he joined band. my daughter will get hers after her rookie year since she will be with her brother in band the first year and not sure when my youngest will get hers since her sister is going to be in band with her most of the time.

as to what to do now....contact the carrier about turning off texting or adding a parental control to determine when the phone can be used. your son gave out his number to the girls so maybe you should talk to him about who he gives his number out to. monitor the texts sent and received to make sure no sexting is going on.

Gosh, I still have to take away the 16-year-old's phone; otherwise it will find its way into his pocket when he leaves for school. Of course that's an issue as well because there are times when the kids need a phone right after school to let me know they're staying for something or to ask to go to someone's house.

Texting just makes me feel old - it seems to be the only way they older one communicates now.

I'm about to enter into a family plan that allows me to allocate the minutes per phone number. That way I can give my kids something I think is reasonable (trust me, they won't agree) and if they go over the phone simply won't work. No overage charge - hooray!

well i have that same problem except mines a girl. i know its invading their privacy but i sneak in at night and look through all the messages

When S does get a cell phone she already knows that I have every right to read whatever she sends out and receives. We have already started enforcing that through the internet. We allowed her to get a myspace and she knows that we have the password. She even knows we have a keylogger that keeps track of everything she types. We are honest with her about reading her stuff and she knows if it is something she doesn't want us to read then it's better not to send it. She will not have privacy online or with a phone until she is an adult. Until then it is up to us to keep our kids safe and it doesn't really matter if they think it's fair or not.