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Discussion:
Birthday Party Blunder
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So last saturday the 14th my son turned 6. we had his party where he wanted...at a bowling ally and things we going great. we had spent the entire month of december drilling in his head to be thankful for whatever gifts he was to get for christmas even if he hated them and he did pretty good. my sister got him this really awesome john deere shirt and he or so i thought loves john deere but when he opened it he was so ugly and rude and it only got worse from there, the said he hated a few other gifts as well, batteries that were in the bag (so he could play his new toys) and some jeans. i have never heard my son be so hurtful and if you know me i am always reminding him on his tone of voice with others and we treat people the way we want to be treated and all that junk. i wanted to tear his butt up right then...what do i do, i feel like now people think i have a rude and ungrateful kid and well i kinda feel the same way too.
Posted on 01/16/12, 04:26 pm
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Reply #1 - 01/17/12  2:48am
" I dont have the answer for you, but I just want you to know you are not alone, my son has done that to me on a couple of occasions. I was sooo embarrassed, he is turning 7 this year. Most of the time he can be very sweet and caring, especially towards me. "
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Reply #2 - 01/17/12  8:42am
" I am just concerned that we give him so much because he is our only child and i want him to be happy and have all the things i didnt. That being said i also dont want him to be ungrateful, any advice on how to prevent that? "
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Reply #3 - 01/17/12  8:56am
" I use discipline methods in the form of sending him to his room, taking things away from him that he likes. He likes to play video games, if he misbehaves then I ban him from using them for a while. The timeout works great. Kids have to know consequences for their actions. I dont want my son to grow up to be a rude boy, I do my best, he is getting better. My boy is an only child too and it will stay that way. I had a Cardiac Arrest in July last year, and my reproductive system hasnt been working since. "
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Reply #4 - 01/25/12  11:45am
" I would take away all his birthday gifts - even the ones he liked. Tell him he needs to apologize to everyone by calling. You can help him through this. Or, even a little note or email to affected people. Hopefully, they do realize he is only 6, and it's his line of defense. It was just simply unacceptable is all to be ungrateful. Once this is done, you will get him stuff back. As for the future, I would remind him you don't want an incident like that again.
Now, all that being said - here's an issue I ran into with my now 12yrold - he was embarrassed by family at a birthday party and didn't want to talk to me about it, so he acted out...Anyway, I dealt with his behavior in a similar fashion - but in the long run, we talked about it and I understood - family can be embarrassing (not intentionally) but non-the-less, I wanted him to enjoy his birthdays - so we have separated them out, staring at 3 years ago - Family day/dinner to celebrate, and a friends sleepover for him and his buddies. We've not had any issues since at least with his behavior - the family embarrassment - yes, but not outbursts, he behaves very gracefully now.
Talk to him, maybe it's something like that with him, just trying to be 'cool' in front of his friends. Good luck. "
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Reply #5 - 02/20/12  10:23am
" I would also take away all of his presents. And I'd make him go with me to Salvation Army (or wherever) and help you give the toys to them.

Have a discussion about him being grateful and other little boys and girls not getting any birthday presents at all because their parents can't afford them. "

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