Parenting Preschoolers (3-5) Support Group

Wow, thats a tough one. I'm blessed with a good sleeper most of the time, so I don't really know what to tell you. If you think it's not a bathroom issue, then I would put her back to bed. I know it stinks because its still you or your husband having to get out of bed, but if you just go in and lay her back down and don't give her any other attention or give in to her demands, hopefully she'll get the hint and stop waking as often. I would say, take her to the bathroom every other time she asks? I can imagine if she can normally hold it through the night, expecting her to hold it for a few hours isn't going to be an issue. I'll hope for your sake that it's just a phase! Just don't play with her or give her anything she wants because it will continue! I imagine that's not something that changes from an infant through childhood.

I would handle this on 2 levels: Firstly, I would give her absolutely no attention at night. So get her up and help her to go to the toilet, but do it with a minimal amount of light and with no conversation at all. Don't engage with her at all once she's gone to bed at night. Second, I would start a reward system: If she only gets up to go bathroom and then goes straight back to bed she gets a star to go on her chart. If she gets up and goes bathroom without you help or doesn't go and stays dry all night instead she gets 2 stars to go on her chart. Once her chart is full (20 stars is fine for my 3 year old.) she gets to pick a reward. Also, the nights don't have to be consecutive, so if she does it on night 1 she gets a star(s) but if she doesn't on the second night she doesn't get a star, but no big deal is made of it. If she does it again on night 3 she gets a star(s).

Start charts have really worked for Clare

my son recently started doing that too, hell be five in a couple weeks. he has the same excuse, his music on. i bought him a new kid-friendly cd player that he can turn on himself and thats helped a bit. he still may get up but its not near as much as he was. when he does i just tell him go back to bed. sometimes i pretend that im asleep and just ignore him and hell go back on his own. i think its more or less a test, like hes trying me. as for going potty, dont let her drink for a few hours before bed and she should be able to wait. you can get her those sleep pants or an absorbant mattress pad in case of accidents, i had those before he was fully trained. oh, i also put a doorknob cover on his door for awhile so he couldnt get out. it may not be too late to ferberize her either. if she cries herself to sleep she may just learn that shes not getting anywhere by waking up mommy and stop doing it. whatever you do, as tired as you may be, dont let her get in bed with you, she may never get out. good luck and i hope you find something that works, without too much drama!

PP said it really, dont interact with your LO when they get out of bed in the middle of the night. If they get no stimulation they will go back to bed. My son went throught a period of time where he would wake for a while in the middle of the nite. He stopped waking me and started playing with his toys. I left him go and he would go back to bed usually. Not that you want to encourage them toplay in the middle of the nite but the point was that he not wake me unless he needed something. usualy a dream would wake him and he couldnt get back to sleep. SO the rule we made was that a 'bed' activity could be done. This usually included a small selection of cars (like 5) and books and stuffies. He wouold lay there fidget and finally work back to sleep.

one problem I w\had was him leaving the bedroom and exploring though. SO I ended up douple gating the hall way (2 gates stacked so he couldnt climb them) I started on his bedroom door but then he couldnt use the bathroom lol so it defeated the self process... but it kept him out of the rest of the house...

GL