What is Ages 12-18 Teenagers
Adolescence is the period of psychological and social transition between childhood and adulthood (gender-specific, manhood, or womanhood). Someone in Adolescence is called a Teenag...
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Over the summer we moved and my kids school district changed. My 10 year old son adapted well and is thriving. My 12 year old daughter on the other hand, gave us quite a scare as she was starting to display many depression like symptoms. We went to a counselor and she advised that making the necessary sacrafices to allow my daughter to go to the school that she would have gone to had we not moved, would be what is best. Hubby and I carpool and have made the sacrafice of leaving 15 minutes earlier each day and driving the opposite direction to drop her off at a friends house. This morning she was extra sassy and not ready to go when it was time (hubby and I cant be late to work), so we left her at home and she will be given a list of chores to complete today. The issue now is, what do we do? I dont feel like putting her in the school in our district is an option, and in order to keep her in her current school, hubby and I would have to stop carpooling and I would have to change my work schedule... When is it more than just doing what is best for her and crosses over into letting her rule the roost?? Suggestions?
Posted on 10/26/09, 09:10 am |
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It might pay to get a second opinion about whether switching to the new school would be detrimental or not. If she is really suffering from depression, it seems like she would need regular therapy and possibly medication. Of course I cannot tell from your message what other things you are doing. I'm not an expert in any way, but my daughter has a close friend that has been suffering from this illness for several years, so I have seen what her parents have had to go through and it can be really tough and many sacrifies have had to be made by them. I hope you are able to work things out... the added stress of changing so much of your lifestyle does not help with the stress of teen behavoir and depression. 
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Thanks for the input. Based on assessment, the counselor said that there was no apparent reason to be concerned about depression as a disorder, but rather it was "situational" and brought on by the drastic life changes that were occuring not just within the family, but specifically with her (puberty, 1st year in junior high, etc, etc).
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it sounds like every one is dancing to your daughters tune, you have turned your life up side down to suit her and she is still not happy, everyone her age is going through puberty and changing schools, you need to sit her down and give her the cold hard facts she either toes the line and is ready promptly to go to the school in her old area or she moves schools give her a few weeks to prove herself.
sorry if this sounds harsh. but from a uk perspective we dont often involve councellors in our lives, we just need to get on with it
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Maggie,
I totally get what you are saying and this is exactly where I struggle. My childhood was disgusting, my parents were incredibly selfish and NOTHING was sugar coated for me. Not having a healthy past to refer to in raising my kids has been the reason that I needed to seek the advice of counselors, and while Im sure their intentions are good, they are shoving this new age parenting approach. They look at me like I am the most insensitive person for wanting to teach her about life as it really is, which isnt always complimentary to what you want... I have been told that I am trying to teach adult concepts to a child... I dont know how else to teach it...
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Adult concepts? I was raised as a "military brat" we moved every few years and I lived in another country for 4. Change IS a part of life, and we can't shield our kids from every single dissapointment. How will they ever learn to cope as adults if they think the whole world is there to make sure they never have a sad moment? Please do yourself and your family a favor. Let her go to school where she is supposed to go, she will adjust! Will she be sad and miss her old friends? Sure, but she'll make new ones and they will live in her neigborhood. It may even get worse for a little while, but eventually she will come around.
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I'm with SRonthego. It is a hard adjustment, moving. Plus puberty on top of it!! (I know, I went through the same thing!) The great thing is that now we have email, facebook, etc. so kids can stay closely in touch with eachother. I wish I had that growing up! Meanwhile, are there any activities she's interested in? Groups/clubs she can join? That always helped me in the friend department...
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