Parenting Newborns & Infants (0-1) Support Group

Don't ever let anyone make you feel guilty.
I am strictly breastfeeding right now, but I formula fed my youngest. Thus, I can speak from both sides of the fence and I know there are pros and cons with breast and bottle.

I chose to formula feed with my first child for personal reasons also. He's growing up just fine and healthy. When I got pregnant with my second, I initially figured I would formula feed but then had a change of heart in the hospital. So I decided to give breastfeeding another try and am so thankful now that I made that decision and wouldn't have it any other way.

That said, you have to do what make you comfortable. Dont worry about what anyone thinks of you! I get angry at bfing moms out there who feel they have the right to judge other moms about their personal decisions - its so wrong!!

These are my PERSONAL reasons if it helps you at all:
The benefits of breastfeeding for me are: the amazing bond (which still can be achieved through bottle feeding of course, but for ME its been just a different and wonderful experience), its free, its the best nutrition available for baby, and its easy (no bottle to clean up or make, etc.)
The benefits to bottle feeding: you don't have to worry about lactating (leaking, pain, pumping if away from baby, puts a damper of sexual relations, etc.), you don't have to be the only one feeding which allows others to bond and u some rest or whatever, no weaning baby, no worries about feeding in public (i refuse to breastfeed in public or less than desirable places), you can drink alcohol/take your medications whenever and how much you need/want, or eat whatever if you LO has an allergy.

I never felt guilty about bottle feeding my child and you shouldn't either! My only advice (having both breastfed and bottle fed exclusively), give bfing a TRY if you want just to see if its for you or not. Either way, I'm sure you will be a GREAT MOM whether you breastfeed or not!:)

As for formulas, go with what your pediatrician recommends. I've always liked similac advance or try the gentle-ease for the little tummys:) Good start is good as well. Best of luck:)

Thanks for your response. I appreciate it alot. I did give bf and expressing a quick try, but for many reasons its just too stressful for me unfortunately. The biggest barrier is that she was premature and so is still in hospital and not with me. Makes the adjustment and learning process alot harder on us both when its something neither of us has ever done before. I also have social anxiety which makes the process harder again because I have to attempt all this in hospital with many other people and babies around whichever is hard enough as is without trying to do something like learning to breast feed. Same for expressing at the hospital. It causes alot of anxiety pulling a boob out there. And I just don't have the patience to express at home. I know some people will say that last bit is selfish but it affects my mental health and stress levels and I feel that im already going to have high stress levels learning to look after a newborn, and minimal sleep, without adding expressing too. Ill burn out and that will negatively affect baby more than not being breast fed I feel. Do these reasons seem reasonable /understandable?
Thanks again for your support.

My daughter was born 8 weeks premature and, due to medical reasons, I was unable to breastfeed. The NICU started her on Enfacare, which is the high-calorie formula made by Enfamil. At her 6 month check-up the pediatrician switched her to "normal" formula and we stayed with Enfamil. She is now 9 months old and in the 50th percentile for weight and 75th for height.

Even though I couldn't breastfeed due to medical reasons, I have never really had the desire to breastfeed. I personally think that you do what is best for you and your well being. If mommy isn't happy, baby won't be either. Don't feel guilty about this choice, many women choose not to breastfeed. Think about it, if most people breastfed then the formula companies would go out of business!

Congratulations on your new addition and good luck with everything!

@jbry35- that's such a good point. If there wasn't a market or demand for formula there wouldn't be so many brands available because how would they sell!!? Thanks. Im so glad u said that. :-)

My son was also preemie (born 10-weeks early). He spent 7 weeks in NICU and breast feeding was not option for us. But I did pump at home and supplement him at NICU. Nurses there used to add Neosure ( brand of Similac, said to be good for preemies) and bottle feed him. When he came home he was not atall interested in breast feeding and only taking bottle. I used to add Neosure at home too. I continued pumping but it was lot of work and at some point I gave up. I had good stock in fridge and thought I will start formula once I am out of stock !! But all of a sudden my son started latching and now is exclusively breast feeding.
I know how hard it is pumping and bottle feeding. I would suggest give it a try... But also if it's not what you want don't beat yourself over it... Don't feel guilty at all... You have brought life into this world and it's a tremendous thing... Forums fed babies also do best and there is nothing wrong in it !! My reasoning when I stopped pumping was if I am stressing myself about it and giving him that milk its not going to be god for him... Your thoughts reflects in breast milk so if you are happy doing it then only do it !!! Someone say that it's a great bonding experience bet mom and baby, but listen from someone who did both - it's not true... I felt bonded equally when I was bottle feeding and now breast feeding.
Only one advantage is breast feeding is free and less work. No bottle prepping, cleaning and stuff... Formulas are freaking expensive ! You can spend that money on other baby fun stuff !!! Just a thought !!!
Good luck with whatever you decide... Don't be ashamed of your decision !!!

My baby was born 8 weeks early and spent 4 weeks in the hospital. She is now 3 months old. She never got the hang of latching on. I tried using a shield but it was just painful and stressful and I decided that pumping and bottle feeding was easier. I fortify the breastmilk with neosure anyway so she would still have needed to bottle feed at least a few times a day to get the neosure and vitamins she was prescribed as well.

I was really shocked how much negativity I got from people about "giving up" on breast feeding. Everyone from the apnea specialist to my obgyn to random people on facebook. To me, it's still the same breast milk so what is the difference??

The point is, you do what you need to do for your baby. If pumping or bf-ing stresses you out, that isn't good for your baby. Formula is a very very close analog to breast milk and plenty of babies who have had a lot worse came out just fine. You don't even want to know what parents used as formula in the past and their babies are fine.

Just keep in mind there are ONE HUNDRED things in breast milk that can't be synthesized...

Don't take this wrong.
I am a breast feeding mommy. My oldest son would not latch on. I tried for 6 weeks, I tried to get help, he wouldn't do it. I was frustrated trying and trying to remain calm and relaxed while my baby was crying. I WANTED to breastfeed but didn't have the proper support at home, with my family, with outside services. He was formula fed and is a perfectly healthy 14 year old boy. If you are going to formula feed make sure you cuddle your baby close to you every time you feed. You can take your top off and still enjoy skin to skin contact which babies need- and it is so precious during the early months. You do not have to share feedings with others if you don't want to, it might actually relieve some of your guilt if you keep that as mommy/baby time. A couple of things to remember: formula spit up stinks and stains. Never prop the bottle or let baby go to sleep with the bottle left in the mouth (falling asleep while eating is not a big deal if you remove the bottle). Also, make sure you stay aware of formula recalls. it doesn't happen often, but it does happen.

As a breast feeding mommy who LOVES breast feeding I would like to encourage you to check out The Leaky Boob.com or on facebook the leaky b@@b. You might find you feel diferently when you see what other moms are doing and dealing with. It really is an amazing experience. I am breast feeding for the third time. I am a mom on the go and with a nursing cover we nurse everywhere. If you do not want to stick with breast feeding I strongly encourage that you GIVE IT A TRY in the hospital where you will have the help of nurses and lactation consultants. The first few days where baby is getting the colostrum would be a good goal to start with because it is so full of antibodies.
I am not trying to guilt you, like I said, my first son was formula fed and we enjoyed a great bonding experience. He is a healthy boy, very smart, athletic, and social. I just know that a little support and encouragement can be helpful.

I am also a mother that has done both. With my first I was able to breastfeed for a little over 3 months. It was very hard. My girl would not go an hour and a half between feedings. I decided at that point if I had any more I would probably supplement/bf and ff.

Well, after 7 years, I was on anxiety medication that I had to quit during pregnancy. I did not want ppd, so I was anxious to start the medication again. My psychiatrist did not recommend breastfeeding while on this medication.

You are not a bad mother if you choose to formula feed. You have to do what is best for you and the baby. Nobody else truly knows your situation. I started my little one on Enfamil Infant and had no problems.