Adoption Support Group

I contacted my birth mum originally and she didnt even own up to being my BM.After a long and gruelling process she has come around.She has hurt me very badly several times in this process and I think if the outcome is good it will be worth it,However with my siblings I am also having a tough time.One won't talk to me cause I know BM another won't because she is upset about finding out about me so late and the other i need advice about as i dont know what is happening there.
I wish I had had more advice going into it.I guess i was propeled by shock which wasn't the best way.It's very very hard sustaining relationships with people you havent been brought up with.Sometimes it seems too much to cope with and i wonder why i keep going.
I think I am glad to have met them but it was after my mum died that i found out at 46yrs old.Maybe too much of a shock all at once.

I've found both my birth parents and although it was not a "Hollywood" ending, I am glad I found them. Finding them, especially my birth father, answered a lot of questions for me. Learning more about the circumstances of my birth brought me peace. As well, I was able to find out about medical issued.

In turn, they were both relieved to know that I was okay, doing well and had a good life.
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I have always known my birth parents. It has been both a positive and negative in my life. Knowing them was nice because I know where I came from and can relate with them a little bit. Seeing them, i think also helped me feel a little less abondoned as well. The not so good part about it is that my birth parents have always gotten into trouble or were asking for something. When they come around, I never know if there are really here to see me or want something from me. Im glad I had the experience to meet them and see them sometimes, but sometimes wish they didnt come around as much and stir up things in my life.

i found my bm after a long search after giving birth to my 2nd child....im so thankful i did, we are not close, but it was closure, i had a sister, and i guess she felt we was going to be sisters...but we do not have the childhood memories that true sisters share...needless to say we stay in touch by phone and thats about it...my bm does not want to me find my father....ive tried but looking for a very common name i have given up...at least i found her! my bm and me and my daughter look like 3 peas in a pod, we look exactly alike...that was the most interesting!

Hey all! I'm new here...31 and an adoptee. I have been searching for my birthparents since I was about 13 and I think I found them both today! what a day...wow!
Anyway, Spoke with my BMs father today...what a JERK! Told me I have ruined my BM's life. etc etc.
Anyhow, I have her contact info & I am going to try to send her a certified letter and see if I get a response.
As for BF, they were never married and I found out that his daughter may be looking for me today...needless to say I am thrilled and waiting for an email back! I will keep you all updated:)
Wish me luck as I wish you all the best!

yup, i found both bm and bf. they got married 3 years after i was born. ive have 3 100% blood brothers. i was given up for adpotion at birth (44 years ago). found my mom and dad 3 years ago. if i could have a do over i would not search. i have not known anyone that it was a good outcome. the sister i grew up with also found her mom and dad (different story then mine). the outcome sucked ass.
im not really accepted, the fact that they got married and had a family shocked the hell out of me, i grew up in the same neighbourhood as they did, the can of worms thing?? well that applies here and the emotional shit that goes along with it is not worth it.
i do truly wish you good luck though if that is what you are planning on doing. your story may be completely different.

So far no reply from BF and I still have yet to contact BM.

Thanks for sharing with me. It's good to hear about others experiences. :)

All reunions are hard. I met my bmom 9 years ago and got to meet my 1/2 sister and brothers. It was not the best situation although there has been a lot of pain, I am very happy I met them. Having answers is better then never knowing.

I was reunited with my son this year and it has been the best thing in my life, we are so close and grow closer every day. It has been hard but we are working it all out together.

It has been a very rocky road, but yeah, really glad I did it. I am close to my bmom now but it took time and energy.

There have been good times and bad. But I think it was worth having the experience. At least I know now; that's what I wanted I guess!